XUANOLOGY

Attention

2006-06-16T21:16:00.000+08:00

My Blog has been changed to :

http://www.xuanology.multiply.com

My Brother

2006-05-13T23:36:00.000+08:00

Did I mentioned before that my brother recently just moved back from his hostel to our house?

Did I mentioned that he has been whipping up fabulous dishes, much to our delight?

Did I mentioned that our family has been greatly blessed by his return?

Eversince my brother came back, he cooked breakfast for us, dinner, and also brownies, cookies.

My gosh, it is not only delicious, but also filled with brotherly love!

Breakfast

Chocolate Milk, with strawberry, mango pudding.
Main Course: Egg Bread, with Cheese, and roti prata, and Ham.

All Home cooked by my kor kor.

(Of course, the milk was bought lah)

Dinner :

Western Food - Grilled fish, choice of Salmon or Cod Fish.

Dish served with cucumbers, lettuces, hashbrowns, tomatoes, and a sunny-side up.

Yummy!!

haha... my family loves bubble tea, and my brother would buy for us to drink.

(Once my dad bought bubble tea back too.. and if you ever see him drink, you would think he is very funny, cute and adorable! hehe..)

My kor kor would accompany my dad to "lim ko pi". (And my dad was so thrilled!)

Just now, I was tired, and decided to lay down on my bed to rest my eyes. I put my spectacles beside me, leaving the lights on.

My brother came into my room, saw me resting, came over to my bed. I thought he was going to "disturb" me. BUT, he took my spectacles, placed it on my table, and off the light.

You have no idea how I felt at that point of time. The care, concern, sensitivity, and love my kor kor has shown towards me - Priceless.

I love you, Kor kor.
You are a blessing from God to this family.

*My sister just came in and asked if I wrote anything about her.
Well, just want to say that honestly, she is the "life" of the family. ALthough she really talk alot, and we often ask her to "shut up", she really brightens up the mood and atmosphere around the house. And all thanks to her, we always get laugh at her funny antics, which she so innocently claim that she didn't mean for it to happen, which I believe.

Things just happen when you are with my sister, whether you like it or not.

=) love you jie jie. You are so cute...

It's all about Jesus.

2006-05-13T22:05:00.001+08:00

Recently, I got pretty discouraged, upset, frustrated, and easily agitated.
If I were to go thru one by one those things that happened, you would have probably thought that I needed some "anger management", or felt the same way as me.

But I'm not going to go into details.

What I want to write down, instead, is about the Lord's goodness.

As my frustrations continued to bugged me, one night, I woke up in the middle of the night. Not sure what caused me to wake up, but it might be my brother. (Long story, but ya... I woke up.)

So, I didn't really got back to sleep cos I felt prompted to pray. So, I lie down on my bed, prayin quietly in Tongues.

Suddenly, I felt loneliness, sadness, fear of this life, filling me.

I immediately prayed even harder and stronger.

And I told the Lord what He already knows.
That sometimes I can be really naughty and foolish. That sometimes, I can be really selfish and irritating.

But I told the Lord, that no matter what happens, I pray, that He will be with me. That He will never take away the Holy Spirit away from me.
I asked the Lord to promise me on that. I didn't get any reply from Him. Cos I was too tired and fell asleep while waiting for Him. But I remember waking up the next day, happy and full of peace.

But that's not the end. The other day, when I felt sadness overpowering me again, I was brought to the remembrance of this song:

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IT'S ALL ABOUT JESUS
IT'S ALL ABOUT THE WAY HE CHANGED OUR LIVES
IT'S ALL ABOUT JESUS
THE POWER OF HIS BLOOD CAN'T BE DENIED
IT'S ALL ABOUT JESUS
IT'S ALL ABOUT THE COVENANT HE MADE
IT'S ALL ABOUT JESUS
VICTORIOUS HE ROSE UP FROM THE GRAVE

WE LIFT OUR HEARTS TO HIM
HE IS THE REASON THAT WE SING
HALLELUJAH, HALLELUJAH, HALLELUJAH
WE PRAISE YOUR NAME
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As I began to sing this song, I realised that it is indeed not about me! It's about the Lord, whom changed my life, whose power of the blood cannot be denied, whom made His covenant with me, whom rose up victoriously from the grave! Praise the Lord!

Immediately, Joy filled my heart and I felt lifted up. I know, I have to look up to the Lord, and keep renewing and transforming my mind with the Truth. That is what I have to do now. I'm getting better. Less provocative, and happier.. haha.. And I pray the Lord will continue to guide me and teach me His ways.

ANd so, today's daily devotion encouraged my heart further:

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(italics, underlined and (brackets) in mine)

Daily in Your Presence
by Rebecca Barlow Jordan

FATHER OF THE HEAVENLY LIGHTS

Every good and perfect gift is from above,coming down from the Father of heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. James 1:17

FROM THE FATHER'S HEART (to me)
My child, I am not like a shadow that moves with the rays of the sun. Everything in My presence radiates My light, for I am the Father of the heavenly lights. The sun, moon, and stars reflect My glory. The angels who serve Me daily wear My light on their wings and glow with My presence. And so do you. Look at Me often, and I will reflect My light through you.

A GRATEFUL RESPONSE (from me to the Lord)

In Your entire world there is one light that never changes. With You, Lord, there is no darkness. You are the Father of all heavenly lights. In Your presence the sun need not shine, for You are the brightness of creation. How brilliant is Your light!

SIMPLE TRUTH
The light of the world is still Jesus.

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Another thing that I want to share.. about the below passage.
(Warning: It's a long sharing.. haha... Mostly cos I extracted passages from the various study notes)

(NLT Version) 1 Sam 16:14 - 23

Now the Spirit of the LORD had left Saul, and the LORD sent a tormenting spirit that filled him with depression and fear.
Some of Saul's servants suggested a remedy. "It is clear that a spirit from God is tormenting you," they said. "Let us find a good musician to play the harp for you whenever the tormenting spirit is bothering you. The harp music will quiet you, and you will soon be well again."
"All right," Saul said. "Find me someone who plays well and bring him here."
One of the servants said to Saul, "The son of Jesse is a talented harp player. Not only that; he is brave and strong and has good judgment. He is also a fine-looking young man, and the LORD is with him."
......................... "And whenever the tormenting spirit from God troubled Saul, David would play the harp. Then Saul would feel better, and the tormenting spirit would go away.

When I read this chapter, a few questions ran through my mind.
I didn't understand why the Lord would send an evil spirit to torment Saul, and why Saul got David to play music for him, instead of seeking the Lord first!

And so, I went to look up the study notes and found interesting stuff!

The 1599 Geneva Study Bible

(e) The wicked spirits are at God’s commandment to execute his will against the wicked.

Commentary Critical and Explanatory on the Whole Bible

14-18. The Spirit of the Lord departed from Saul, and an evil spirit from the Lord troubled him--His own gloomy reflections, the consciousness that he had not acted up to the character of an Israelitish king, the loss of his throne, and the extinction of his royal house, made him jealous, irritable, vindictive, and subject to fits of morbid melancholy.

21. David came to Saul--Providence thus prepared David for his destiny, by placing him in a way to become acquainted with the manners of the court, the business of government, and the general state of the kingdom. became his armour-bearer--This choice, as being an expression of the king's partiality, shows how honorable the office was held to be.

23. David took an harp, and played with his hand: so Saul was refreshed, and was well--The ancients believed that music had a mysterious influence in healing mental disorders.

Matthew Henry Complete Commentary on the Whole Bible

Verses 14-23

We have here Saul falling and David rising.

I. Here is Saul made a terror to himself (v. 14): The Spirit of the Lord departed from him. He having forsaken God and his duty, God, in a way of righteous judgment, withdrew from him those assistances of the good Spirit with which he was directed, animated, and encouraged in his government and wars.
He lost all his good qualities.

This was the effect of his rejecting God, and an evidence of his being rejected by Him.

Now God took his mercy from Saul (as it is expressed, 2 Sa. 7:15); for, when the Spirit of the Lord departs from us, all good goes.

When men grieve and quench the Spirit, by wilful sin, he departs, and will not always strive.

The consequence of this was that an evil spirit from God troubled him. Those that drive the good Spirit away from the do of course become prey to the evil spirit.

If God and his grace do not rule us, sin and Satan will have possession of us.

The devil, by the divine permission, troubled and terrified Saul, by means of the corrupt humours of his body and passions of his mind.

He grew fretful, and peevish, and discontented, timorous and suspicious, ever and anon starting and trembling; he was sometimes, says Josephus, as if he had been choked or strangled, and a perfect demoniac by fits.

This made him unfit for business, precipitate in his counsels, the contempt of his enemies, and a burden to all about him.

II. Here is David made a physician to Saul, and by this means brought to court, a physician that helped him against the worst of diseases, when none else could.
David was newly appointed privately to the kingdom. It would be of use to him to go to court and see the world; and here his doing so is brought about for him without any contrivance of his own or his friends.

Note, Those whom God designs for any service His providence shall concur with His grace to prepare and qualify for it.

Saul is distempered; his servants have the honesty and courage to tell him what his distemper is (v. 15), an evil spirit, not by chance but from God and his providence, troubleth thee. Now,

1. The means they all advised him to for his relief was music (v. 16): "Let us have a cunning player on the harp to attend thee.’’ How much better friends had they been to him if they had advised him, since the evil spirit was from the Lord, to give all diligence to make his peace with God by true repentance, to send for Samuel to pray with him and to intercede with God for him! then might he not only have had some present relief, but the good Spirit would have returned to him.

But their project is to make him merry, and so cure him.

Many whose consciences are convinced and startled are for ever ruined by such methods as these, which drown all care of the soul in the delights of sense. Yet Saul’s servants did not amiss to send for music as a help to cheer up the spirits, if they had but withal sent for a prophet to give him good counsel.

And (as bishop Hall observes) it was well they did not send for a witch or diviner, by his enchantments to cast out the evil spirit, which has been the abominably wicked practice of some that have worn the Christian name, who consult the devil in their distresses and make hell their refuge. It will be no less than a miracle of divine grace if those who thus agree with Satan ever break off from him again.

2. One of his servants recommended David to him, as a fit person to be employed in the use of these means, little imagining that he was the man whom Samuel meant when he told Saul of a neighbour of his, better than he, who should have the kingdom, ch. 15:28.

It is a very high character which the servant of Saul’s here gives of David (v. 18), that he was not only fit for his purpose as a comely person and skilful in playing, but a man of courage and conduct, a mighty valiant man, and prudent in all matters, fit to be further preferred, and (which crowned his character) the Lord is with him.

By this it appears that though David, after he was anointed, returned to his country business, and there remained on his head no marks of the oil, so careful was he to keep that secret, yet the workings of the Spirit signified by the oil could not be hid, but made him shine in obscurity, so that all his neighbours observed with wonder the great improvements of his mind on a sudden. David, even in his shepherd’s garb, has become an oracle, a champion, and every thing that is great. His fame reached the court soon, for Saul was inquisitive after such young men, ch. 14:52. When the Spirit of God comes upon a man he will make his face to shine.

3. David is hereupon sent for to court. And it seems,

(2.) Saul became very kind to him (v. 21), loved him greatly, and designed to make him his armour-bearer, and (contrary to the manner of the king, ch. 8:11) asked his father’s leave to keep him in his service (v. 22): Let David, I pray thee, stand before me. And good reason he had to respect him, for he did him a great deal of service with his music, v. 23. Only his instrumental music with his harp is mentioned, but it should seem, by the account Josephus gives, that he added vocal music to it, and sung hymns, probably divine hymns, songs of praise, to his harp.

David’s music was Saul’s physic.

[1.] Music has a natural tendency to compose and exhilarate the mind, when it is disturbed and saddened. Elisha used it for the calming of his spirits, 2 Ki. 3:15. On some it has a greater influence and effect than on others, and, probably, Saul was one of those.

Not that it charmed the evil spirit, but it made his spirit sedate, and allayed those tumults of the animal spirits by which the devil had advantage against him. The beams of the sun (it is the learned Bochart’s comparison) cannot be cut with a sword, quenched with water, or blown out with wind, but, by closing the window-shutters, they may be kept out of the chamber. Music cannot work upon the devil, but it may shut up the passages by which he has access to the mind.

[2.] David’s music was extraordinary, and in mercy to him, that he might gain a reputation at court, as one that had the Lord with him. God made his performances in music more successful, in this case, than those of others would have been. Saul found, even after he had conceived an enmity to David, that no one else could do him the same service (ch. 19:9, 10), which was a great aggravation of his outrage against him.

It is a pity that music, which may be so serviceable to the good temper of the mind, should ever be abused by any to the support of vanity and luxury, and made an occasion of drawing the heart away from God and serious things: if this be to any the effect of it, it drives away the good Spirit, not the evil spirit.

Interesting, isn't it? The things that the Lord already told us in the bible.

Passion

2006-04-30T15:09:00.000+08:00

Attended service today and Pastor Mark Conner preached.

He is so gentle, and so sincere in what he preached. Really like this pastor alot.

What he said did struck my heart.

Some of the things that he said that left a deep impression in me:

=> Enthusiasm and Persistence will make an average person superior, Indifference and Lethargy will make a superior person inferior!

How right that is. The attitude and the passion that you have when you do your work is so important. You may be very brilliant at what you do, but the moment you portray lethargicness, indifference, and "heckcareness", it just simplies put ppl off.

On the other hand, when you have a good attitude, have the passion and enthusiasm, it's so easy to get things done, and the process is so much bearable.

=> If we don't guard and fuel our passion/flame for God, it'll die off over time. We are responsible to keep our fire burning for Christ!

=> People are always talking about time management. But what about ENERGY management?

You can have good time management, for example, a doctor reaching in time to a patient's home to examine the patient. What the patient hope, would not only be the doctor's timeliness and promptness. But also the Doctor's energy, and attitude. Is the doctor able to commit fully to the patient at that point of time, with confidence and concentration. Or is the doctor frustrated, annoyed, angry?

Hence, we must be careful. Not to overlook our energy management. Apart from time management, what we gotta keep in check, is also our energy management.

=> We have our Spiritual gauges. We have our physical gauges. But we often neglect our emotional gauges.

I've often heard of people quoting to me that life is like a marathon. Alot of times I agree. Because I felt like at times, I seem to be running and running, out of breath, and never able to complete the race.

However, Pastor Mark Conner has brought new light to my understanding.

Life is not a marathon. It is instead, a series of 100m Sprints.

Why?

Because those who sprints, are always so refreshed, fully commited and concentrated for the race, and after the race, they get to rest and refresh themselves before engaging in another race.

How true!

Even Jesus, whom loves the people and fellowshipped and teached them, needed time alone in God's Presence, to have time to himself to rest and refresh Himself, to pray. (He retreated to the mountain).

Ever notice people who run in marathons are always tired, pale and out of breath?

Regardless whether life is a marathon, or a 100m Sprint. To me, it feels like a race, with a series of sprint races. It is a race, but it will be a race where I will not give up, will keep on burning for Christ, where I will run and rest to refresh myself, I will not grow weary in doing good (the things in His Will), but will guard my heart for Christ, and to press forward for the upward goal In Christ Jesus (Our heavenly calling, call to salvation, call to Heaven).

Life is indeed a race.

1 Cor 9: 24 - 27

Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may obtain it. And everyone who competes for the prize is temperate in all things. Now they do it to obtain a perishable crown, but we for an imperishable crown. Therefore I run thus: not with uncertainty. Thus I fight: not as one who beats the air. But I discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified.

Heb 12:1-3

Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider Him who endured such hostility from sinners against Himself, lest you become weary and discouraged in your souls.

=> Lukewarmness: Serving God without offending the devil!

What a good explanation! We are, of course, all called to our own area to serve, by the Will of God. But, be it in the market place, or in full time ministry, we all can be passionate about our work. It's not ordinary work, it's work for Christ, work, unto the Lord.

I often thought working in a company is different from serving the Lord. I always thought, how can the 2 combine? But yes, when you are working, you are working for the Lord. Whatever attitude you show, you show it to the Lord. For example, there was once, I was asked to help someone to complete the file conversion. At first, I grumbled and complained. (Me bad gal.. hehe..) But suddenly, I was reminded, that my life, my work at the market place is actually for the Lord. To shine for the Lord, to be faithful, and to grow and mould my character. If I am not faithful in the little things, if I can't even do such a simple and small thing with the Spirit of excellence, faithfulness, and passion, how can God place bigger things in my care, under my stewardship? So ya, even in the most normal work that we have, we can do it in the most extraordinary way, honouring and glorifying God. (Even giving testimonies of God's goodness in our work place! Praise the Lord.)

=> Activation of of Spiritual gifts creates energy and ignite passion.

Indeed! My sister and I prayed together on saturday nite. And as we prayed for each other, I sensed a word for her, and she, a word for me.

Immediately the next day, my sister received confirmation and I in turn, received confirmation on the Word given to me as well!

Praise the Lord! Indeed, with the activation of gifts, (in this case, we prayed, and spoke a word of knowledge and confirmations came), faith and passion increased in us.

- Ever felt frustrated about something? It may lead you to your calling.

If you ever felt frustrated about someone whom does not sing as well, maybe you are called to worship. This frustration is not talking about pride. But more of a burden, a nudge in the heart, that says, "Hey, I should and want to do this for God." Maybe you are close to discovering your calling from there.

=> When you are feeling down and overwhelmed by challenges, what can you do?

Haha.. Humans have a way of magnifying their troubles and challenges. Take for example, there was once, when I was a young christian, I felt so overwhelmed and totally soaked in the challenges of my France trip, that I felt it was impossible for me to go on or do anything else. But as I told sis Cheng that I had so much problems that it is near to impossible for me to solve, she asked me a question that startled me. I had expected her to console me instead of asking me," List out your problems and let me hear."

After listing the 2nd or 3rd problem, I found myself with no more problems to share and to make sis Cheng sympatise with me. Suddenly, I felt that my problems are so small and I had previously magnified them and caused much misery to myself.

So, one of the things u can do when u feel overwhelmed by problems? List them out one by one and attempt to solve them one by one.

Another thing you can do which Pastor said today, which made me laughed hysterically.

That is to list down your trials and tribulations on one side of the paper, and Paul's Trials and tribulations on the other side of the paper. You will realised that, yours is nothing compared to his, and yet, through the things that he went through, he was able to give thanks to God, and count himself priviledged to be in the ministry, and to go through those things for His Name's Sake. Hello? Are we overestimating our own problems? Get your problems checked, seek God's help! We got a God bigger than our problems..

=> What you are tolerant of, you will not change.

Exodus 8:8-10.

Hahaha.. When I heard what Pastor Mark Conner said, I almost fell off my chair.. haha... no lah.. not so exaggerated. But it was a good point made. Pharoah could ask Moses to help him take away the frogs, even immediately. But Pharoah chose "Tomorrow.".

What a choice.

Last but not least, just wanna share an incident that happened just now.

My sis wanted to buy something from Attributes, and I thought, I could queue up for her first, since the queue was so long. And I was just staring into blank space and sinking deep into my thoughts when I heard the music nearby me soften.

I snapped out of my thoughts and saw right in front of me, a very thoughtful security brother. He lowered the volume of the CD player at the Rack, because, 2 young children were trying to hear the music from the CD player ear piece. (Those station where you can hear the CD music, like HMV). With the loud music blasting away, the young children might spoil their ears by increasing the volume of their earpiece.

I was so impacted by his thoughtfulness and sensitivity to his surroundings!

This really teaches me, to be even more sensitive and thoughtful to the needs of other people.

Ok, off I am to study. I even got class tomorrow! whole day somemore! haha..

But ya, Will study hard! hehehe...

Love! =)

Psalms 91

2006-04-26T11:31:00.000+08:00

Those who live in the shelter of the Most High
will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

This I declare of the LORD: He alone is my refuge, my place of safety;
he is my God, and I am trusting him.

For he will rescue you from every trap and protect you from the fatal plague.
He will shield you with his wings.
He will shelter you with his feathers.
His faithful promises are your armor and protection.

Do not be afraid of the terrors of the night, nor fear the dangers of the day,
nor dread the plague that stalks in darkness, nor the disaster that strikes at midday.
Though a thousand fall at your side, though ten thousand are dying around you, these evils will not touch you.

But you will see it with your eyes; you will see how the wicked are punished.
If you make the LORD your refuge, if you make the Most High your shelter,
no evil will conquer you; no plague will come near your dwelling.

For he orders his angels to protect you wherever you go.

They will hold you with their hands to keep you from striking your foot on a stone.
You will trample down lions and poisonous snakes; you will crush fierce lions and serpents under your feet!

The LORD says, "I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name. When they call on me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue them and honor them. I will satisfy them with a long life and give them my salvation."

Breakfast of Love

2006-04-26T11:28:00.000+08:00

Every morning, without fail, my mom would prepare both my sis's and my breakfast.
(We so blessed, right? hehe...)

Recently, my brother finished his exams and moved back home from his hostel.

So this morning, when I was preparing my stuff for work, I walked past the kitchen and I saw something that stopped me in my tracks.

I saw my brother and my mother in the kitchen!

My brother woke up from his sleep to prepare a sumptous breakfast of love for me and my sis.

I was so amazed! haha... my brother was even so detailed to the fact that he minus the cheese away for my sis's bread, and add in the cheese for me, in my bread.
(Cos my sis dun really like cheese unless it's in pizza and burgers and certain food items. But on the other hand, I love cheese!)

My brother even decorated our breakfast tupperware with lettuce and pieces of bread (that you put in soups).

Did I mentioned that the bread contains egg, Cheese, and HAM?? *yummy....
My gosh, so blessed!

(Not to mention that ever since my brother came back, he tried to help my mom cook delicious food for us to eat and helped to wash all the dishes and pans! This is so important cos you know la, after a day of work, what could be happier than coming home to a sumptous homecooked meal without having to wash the plates? hahaha....)

So, after I happily took my breakfast box, I went downstairs to my dad, whom was waiting to fetch me to the mrt (faithfully, every morning). Haiz.... so blessed!

Even I have to admit, I am not as faithful to them as they are to me, not even as serving and loving.

So yaz, I pray that I be able to love, honour them and serve them, and to take care of them. =)

Just a note la... My sis wants to hold a cooking competition between the 3 of us. But to tell the truth, I will admit defeat before we begin (COs i know surely i wun win one, and I can't be bothered.. hahaha) and my sis can carry on with the competition. And I can tell u, my sis will surely lose lo! Why ah? Cos my sis can only cook maggie mee and those instant stuff (even these, she has problems....).. BUT my kor kor... can cook western food, can marinate chicken and prawns, can invent dishes.... Hello? Tell me la, who will win?
ANyway, I shouldn't "Judge".. or admit defeat before I "fight"... but cooking? eh... spare me!
* I'll learn to cook next time bahz.. when I have a bf.. wahahahaha...

Prayer Meeting

2006-04-26T11:22:00.000+08:00

Well, yesterday, I went to the Prayer Meeting. It was really a good time of fellowship with my sister before the PM, and I am happy that I prayed for the church.

Yesterday, as I prayed, I felt the below messages dropped into my heart and mind:

- "As you satisfy the needs of others, I will satisfy yours."
(Meaning, as I satisfy the needs of others, God will satisfy my needs.)

- Even as I was worshipping, singing to the lyrics of the song, indeed, I felt even more strongly, that I want to let Jesus be in total control, Let Jesus have His way in my life (and the church). And what I want, is to go to His secret place.

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My sis bought me a Joyce Meyer book. When I first set my eyes on tat book, I really wanted to buy it.
But after thinkin about my tight budget and many unread books at home, I decided to postpone the purchase.

But my sis, saw that I liked it alot, decided to blessed me with it.
Thank you jie jie. You are always so kind and loving towards me.

In that Joyce Meyer book, "Knowing God intimately", it talks about drawing closer to God, havin a close relationship with Him. That by the Blood of Jesus, the veil that separates us from God has been lifted, and now, we can enter into His full Presence, worshipping Him before His throne, in Spirit and in Truth.

I have barely covered the introduction, haha.. so yup, will write more as I read on...

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I do believe, that this season, is a time where I come back to His secret place, to know Him even more intimately and to dwell in the safety of His Arms.

I pray that, I will become a woman after God's own heart.

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"Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it".
-Isa 30:21

This is the assurance that I have from the Lord. That no matter what I do, where I go, His Holy Spirit leads and guides me. He will bring me through my days on earth, and strengthen my heart to endure it, to fufill His Purpose.
Praise the Lord!

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POUR DOWN LIKE WATER
CHRISTIAN CITY CHURCH
Worship

COME HOLY SPIRIT
COME HOLY SPIRIT
COME TO THIS PLACE
COME NOW WITH FIRE WITH GRACE
COME HEAL MY HEART WHERE IT'S BEEN BROKEN
SOFTEN MY HEART
LET ME BE FREE, SO FREE

POUR DOWN LIKE WATER
FLOW THROUGH MY SOUL
COME AND MAKE ME WHOLE

FALL
HILLSONG
Worship

I LOVE TO WORSHIP YOU MY GOD
I LOVE TO WORSHIP YOU MY LORD
AND SEE YOUR SPIRIT FALL IN POWER
YOUR LOVE UNFOLDING GIFTS FROM HEAVEN

I LOVE TO WORSHIP YOU MY GOD
I LOVE TO WORSHIP YOU MY LORD
AND FEEL YOUR PRECIOUS BREATH OF HEAVEN
YOUR ALL CONSUMING LOVE

HOLY SPIRIT COME IN POWER
CHANGE MY HEART I WANT TO LIVE FOR YOU MY GOD
LET YOUR SPIRIT COME IN POWER CHANGE MY LIFE
THAT I MAY LIVE FOR YOU MY LORD

FALL ON US LORD

SO I YEARN FOR YOU
LONG TO SEE YOU MOVE
OH I LIFT MY HANDS
BEFORE MY KING AND PRAY

Have Your Way

THIS YEARNING DEEP WITHIN ME
REACHES OUT TO YOU
YOUR OIL OF JOY FOR MOURNING
SOAKS ME, MAKES ME NEW

AND I WILL GO TO YOUR SECRET PLACE
BOW MY KNEE TO YOUR GLORIOUS THRONE
HAVE YOUR WAY IN MY HEART, O LORD
HAVE YOUR WAY

I NEED YOU HOLY SPIRIT
FIRE TO MY SOUL
CONSUME MY TOTAL BEING
JESUS TAKE CONTROL

Easter

2006-04-11T09:46:00.000+08:00

Easter is coming.
2 events happened yesterday that made me link it with the theme of Easter this year.
Wat choices will you make?

The first thing that happened yesterday, was the love of my sis.

Recently, I committed myself into alot of activities, on top of my school. Hence, I got very busy, and tired.

My sis is a very busy person as well. She has her own committments and things to do. Yet, she gave. She gave me her time and energy.
Knowing that I was very tired, she decided to do something practical for me. Drive me home whenever she can after my activities ended.

Take for example, yesterday night, she could have went home and reached home earlier to have a rest. BUT, she chose to wait for me, while waiting for me, spent time praying and in the Lord's Presence, and then drove me home.
Yesterday, when she told me that she was going to wait for me and fetch me home, a thought ran through my mind immediately.

My mind shouted," Hey, I'm not worth your trouble!". In fact, I did conveyed this thought to my sis previously a few times, that I am not worth her time and effort. She can better use the time to do her own things.

But, her commitment and love to me, thought otherwise. To convenient me, and to ease my tiredness.

The second thing that happened? I met a friend.

Well, to be exact, we weren't exactly friends because I didn't really know him, and lateron, I didn't see him again. UNTIL Yesterday.

I saw him and I was pretty happy to see him again after so long. (Well, it was quite long and that I almost forgot about this person. Opps... ) He saw me and was trying to remember who this familiar face was and finally broke out into a smile.

We had a short conversation and he revealed something to me which really shocked me.
In fact, it left me thinking after that. But Still, we can love the person and hate that sin.

You know, in life, the choices that we make, really do either Make us, OR Break us.

You may think it is just another decision. But have you paused to think the extent of impact it would have on the people around you?

Have you paused to think how would that decision affect you in the future?

Is the word, "Consequence" familiar to you?

From these 2 incidents, I have realised some things.

My sister's love towards me has already made me felt unworthy. How much more the overwhelming love of our Heavenly Father?
Yet, By the Blood of Jesus, we need not live in condemnation or guilt. But we can come before Him, boldly and in His Presence, and stand upon His Promises. The Promises that He has given to us.

To my fellow Christians whom are reading this, I want to ask you, Are you living a life that is disciplined and focused, with the Foundation of God's Word in your life? Guard and protect your heart and relationship with the Lord.
Make the decision to draw near to Him.

To anybody whom will read this blog:
So, as Easter draws near, what choice will you make today?
To come, and experience the love of Jesus Christ, or to remain where you are?
So, anybody interested to come to my church for Easter, hahaha... drop me a note bahz... =)

Love.

Breakfast of love

2006-04-05T09:29:00.000+08:00

Wah.. me so blessed.. now munching on bread with egg... cos my mummy woke up early to prepare it for me and my jie jie!

My mom was so happy cooking just now cos she simply loves..... the pan... she just bought the new pan and can't wait to cook food for us..
ah... i love my mummy...

Then jie jie, yesterday nite papa took mango for us to eat again! hahaha.. the 2 sides somemore!

hahaha.. so funny la...

Yesterday nite, when I was in school during break time, it was really crowded and people were cramming up the corridors.
I was with my classmates when we tried to walk through the crowds to go back to our class.

But it was really irritating to wait for the crowd to clear and not being able to walk through smoothly.. people were practically blocking and in our way!

So... in frustration, I went, "AIYOHHHH!!!!" At my loud "AIYOH", a few people immediately cleared the way.. and my classmates immediately pulled me away before I could say anything else...
When they were pulling me away, my classmates were all laughing and asked me jokingly not to bully those people...

I was like.... eh... since when did i bully anyone? I wasn't even going to say anything nasty.. hahaha... perhaps just say another loud "EXCUSE ME"...
That would be all lo... hehehe... but ya la.. i was abit rude... but.. honestly, at that kind of situation, it would be good to let ppl know that they are blocking others and not being very considerate...

But ya.. it was funny...

okok.. I came across something interesting and thought, perhaps I can ask u all and see what answer I get.
I mean, it's just a thinking question. Dun be too serious about it...

Scenario: You were travelling alone in a jungle and you stumble upon a tribe. The tribal chief likes you and decided to bring you back to their tents.
At this point of time, they are having their sacrificial ceremonial, where 10 would be killed. ANd being the tribal chief whom likes you, he gives you the choice.
Either you kill one to please him, and the other 9 will live. OR, you refuse to kill and ALL 10 will die (killed by others).

Which choice would you make? Kill one and 9 live, or kill none and all 10 die?
It's not a trick question la.. But the topic I was studying on was about ethics. Thought it be interesting to find out how ppl would choose..
So, tell me wat u think la.... and yes, u only got 2 choices for this case.

By the way, people, please pray for me.. cos both my legs are feeling the strain from dancing and tiredness...
These few days, my knees are having pain... and today, I am having difficulty walking cos there was a sudden lingering pain in the area above my ankle.

Please pray for me! Thanks!

"Greater is God in me than the devil in the world".

Love of a family

2006-03-23T09:53:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, I reached home nearing midnight. And my mom happily came out and said she kept the KFC Salad on the table for my supper.
When I saw my dad in the living room, I thought he would be scolding me for returning home at such a late hour.

And as I sat down to eat, my dad disappeared and reappeared with a cup of "tea". (He deliberately kept the name of the tea from me and asked me to taste it first)

Well, probably my dad knew i wun lik the tea, so he just asked me to taste it first. With a mouthful of chicken and vegetable in my mouth, I tried the drink and found that it tasted like orange. But I was suspicious cos normally the drinks that my dad "brew" for me, are not very "normal" and what I deemed as "weird".

So I asked my dad what this drink was. And my dad softly said is.......... Ginger tea...

My first thought was to burst out and say I hate Ginger and do not want to drink.
But instead, I knew my dad brewed the drink with love. So I told my dad that it was nice and very tasty.... (quite true. It actually tasted like orange)

My dad began to brim with satisfaction, saying this tea is good for liver and tiredness... blah blah....
(Though later, I subtlely hinted to my dad that I hate ginger stuff... haha... Cos if I dun tell him... the next thing I know, he might appear with lots of ginger stuff for me to eat. Aiyoh...)

But really felt so loved. Tat my mom was so tired but stayed up just to welcome me home and to tell me that supper was on the table. ANd my dad actually din scold me, but brewed the tea for me cos he knew that I was very tired.

I think one of the most precious love, is the love of our parents. Parents' love are so noble. That they are willing to sacrifice for their children and perhaps even die for them.

As I read the story that Bev forwarded to me (have posted it up, "Thank you for your time"), I think my parents' love and time for me are very valuable. And is one of the best present God ever gave to me.

Thank You, Lord. For blessing me with my family, and being my heavenly Father whom I can depend on for ever.

Seats giving

2006-03-23T09:49:00.000+08:00

Was on my way home yest on the train, when something amusing happened.
To start off, as I entered the train, I managed to find a seat and sat down to rest.
(I love to sleep on trains cos can rest mahz... though not much of an image when fell into deep sleep... haha... cos kept nodding head.. oh no... hehe..)

As I was saying, I was seated down when I saw an elderly lady standing quite near me. My train of thoughts are as follow:

"Oh... elderly person.... muz give up seat..."
"But I very tired.... I really want to rest..... "
"Mayb can shut my eyes straight away... "
"Pretend never see la...."
"But hor... what if some one saw me never offer seat to elderly?"
"Heck la... "
"But hor.... What would God think?"

At that thought, somehow, my feet immediately sprang up..... even I was shocked at my reaction at the question of "what would God think?"...
Yes, what would God think of you?
I gave up my seat immediately to the lady.

At the next station, I was rewarded with a seat again... As I sat down happily, glad that I have a seat to rest again... I spotted another elderly man..
I thought to myself... "BU HUI BA?" (Is this really happening?)
Ok lo... I offered my seat to him but he smiled at me and said is ok... he dun wan to sit.. so I sat down, *phew.... and began my rest on the train for the rest of the journey...

Really la.. In whatever we do, let's have an attitude of, "What would God think?".

I want to be a God-fearing woman of God and honor Him in all my ways, with the guidance of the Holy SPirit in every area of my life.
Amen.

Thank you for your time

2006-03-23T09:45:00.000+08:00

Thank you Bev, for forwarding this to me.

-------------------------------
To The People In My Life

P.S.: Please read till the end.. :) and have a great day!

A young man learns what's most important in life from the guy next door.
It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls,
career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across
the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy
life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to
spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing
could stop him.

Over the phone, his mother told him, "Mr. Belser died last night. The
funeral is Wednesday."

Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly
remembering his childhood days.

"Jack, did you hear me?"

"Oh sorry, Mom. Yes, I heard you. It' s been so long since I thought of
him. I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago," Jack said.
"Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were
doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of
the fence' as he put it," Mom told him.

"I loved that old house he lived in," Jack said.

"You know, Jack, after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make
sure you had a man's influence in your life," she said.

"He's the one who taught me carpentry," he said. "I wouldn't be in this
business if it weren't for him. He spent a lot of time teaching me
things he thought were important...Mom, I'll be there for the funeral,"
Jack said.

As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his
hometown. Mr. Belser's funeral was small and uneventful. He had no
children of his own, and most of his relatives had passed away.

The night before he had to return home, Jack and his Mom stopped by to
see the old house next door one more time. Standing in the doorway, Jack
paused for a moment. It was like crossing over into another dimension, a
leap through space and time. The house was exactly as he remembered.
Every step held memories. Every picture, every piece of
furniture....Jack stopped suddenly.

"What's wrong, Jack?" his Mom asked.

"The box is gone," he said.

"What box?" Mom asked.

"There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I
must have asked him a thousand times what was inside. All he'd ever tell
me was the thing I value most," Jack said. It was gone. Everything
about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box.
He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it.

"Now I'll never know what was so valuable to him," Jack said. "I
better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom."

It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died. Returning home from
work one day Jack disc overed a note in his mailbox. "Signature required
on a package. No one at home. Please stop by the main post office within
the next three days," the note read.

Early the next day Jack retrieved the package. The small box was old and
looked like it had been mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was
difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention.
"Mr. Harold Belser" it read.

Jack took the box out to his car and ripped open the package. There
inside was the gold box and an envelope. Jack's hands shook as he read
the note inside. "Upon my death, please forward this box and its
contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I valued most in my life."
A small key was taped to the letter. His heart racing, as tears filling
his eyes, Jack carefully unlocked the box.

There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch. Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover. Inside he found these words engraved: "Jack, Thanks for your time! - Harold Belser."

"The thing he valued most...was...my time."

Jack held the watch for a few minutes, then called his office and
cleared his appointments for the next two days. "Why?" Janet, his
assistant asked.

"I need some time to spend with my son," he said. "Oh, by the way,
Janet...thanks for your time!"

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the
moments that take our breath away,"

Think about this. You may not realize it, but it's true.

1. At least 2 people in this world love you so much that they would
die for you.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
3. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they
don't like you.
4. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
5. You mean the world to someone.
6. If not for you, someone may not be living.
7. You are special and unique.
8. When you think you have no chance of getting what you want, you
probably won't get it, but if you trust God to do what's best, and wait
on His time, sooner or later, you will get it or something better.
9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good can still
come from it.
10. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a
look; you most likely turned your back on the world.
11. Someone that you don't even know exists, loves you.
12. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the
rude
remarks.
13. Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will feel much
better when they know and you'll both be happy.
14. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that
they are great.

If you send this letter to all the people you care about, you will
certainly brighten someone's day and might change their perspective on
life... for the better.

To everyone I sent this: "Thank you for your time."

"Lord make me an instrument of thy peace.
Where there is hatred let me sow love;
Where there is doubt, true faith in you.
Where there is despair, let me bring hope; Where there is darkness, only
light; And where there is sadness, ever joy" - St Francis of Assisi

3 Days Leave!

2006-03-01T11:16:00.000+08:00

Exam is coming again..

This time, I took 3 days leave.. to really focus on studying..
*I was trying to clear my stuff like crazy yesterday! Mad rush!

So after this blog entry, off I will be going to study!

Just wanna blog about the summary of the events that happened.

Pastor Ulf came. And on fri service, originally I was sitting on the fence whether or not to go.
Cos I was struggling between going home to study, and to go for the service.

But finally, I decided to go for the service. Cos when I was doing my work, and suddenly nearing the evening, I felt so strong, that I should go and something just drew me... THat I felt like I have to go to the service. It was as if God was askin me to decide between going home (to study) and going into His Presence that nite.

So I made the decision to go and it really set me off thinking by the end of it.
During worship, I was askin God how the prophetic service could be a vision to me, could be integrated into my heart, flowing together with the church?

And I was reminded of the testimonies that I shared in cg, and I felt as if, that the Lord would bless me, that my life would be filled with the works of the Holy Spirit, that people will look into my life, and see that the Lord is indeed God! And through me, get to know who Jesus really is.

And I pray that what I felt is indeed true and that it will come to pass.

On fri nite, I went to read the bible, continuing from where I left off the nite before.
And as I read on, I came to the part on Gifts of Spirit. I recalled, Bro Isa previously said that I could have had the Gifts of Healing. RIght there and then, I wondered: Do I really have the gifts of Healing?

Sat service, Pastor Ulf preached about Gifts of Healing!
Praise the Lord!

My confusion about Healing was cleared right there.
How often Jesus healed the people!
WHen we read how Jesus healed people, we should never read it as something outside of us. But we should be in it. We should be praying for healing too! Cos we are a body of Christ. We are not outside of Christ. He is in us, and us in Him. We must exercise this authority in the Mighty Name of Jesus.

Let us start the lifestyle of Healing.
THe more we pray, the more the annointing.
SO, let's continue to pray for those who are sick.
For the Lord has not given us a Spirit of Fear, But a Spirit of LOVE, POWER and of SOUND MIND!
(CAPS in mine.)

And so it was, I was reading the bible on sat nite, picking up from where I left off again, on fri nite.

Previously was sharing with Laiyin, the burden and discouragement I was facin, about some cg matters.

And there it was, the verse, as if waiting for me, says:

"So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and immovable. Always work enthusiatically for the Lord, knowing that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless."
- 1 Cor 15:58

This verse really encouraged me alot.

And yesterday nite, I was talking to Jireh. And he taught me about exegesis and eisigesis.

Exegesis - studying the Bible based on its context; considering the background etc...to get the original meaning

Eisigesis - making a personal interpretation of the Bible passage (often based on personal experiences)

He was saying that both are important and should not be seperated from each other.

Hence, upon curiosity, I went to look up the study notes on 1 Cor 15:58. And guess what I found? A whole lot of substance which explained the verse even more.

(Materials from Crosswalk.com)

1 Corinthians 15:58 (John Gill's Exposition of the Bible)

Therefore my beloved brethren…

This is the conclusion of the whole, and contains the use the apostle makes of the above doctrine, addressing the saints at Corinth in the most tender and affectionate manner; owning the spiritual relation they stood in to him, and expressing the great love he had for them, which filled him with a concern for them, that they might be both sound in principle, and right in practice, and continue so:

be ye steadfast, unmoveable;

in all the doctrines of the Gospel, and particularly in this of the resurrection of the dead, which he had been labouring throughout the whole chapter:

always abounding in the work of the Lord;

going on in it, being more and more in the practice of it; either in the work of the ministry, which some of them were in, to which the Lord had called them, and for which he had fitted and qualified them, and in which his glory was greatly concerned, and therefore called his work; or any other work, even all good works, which the Lord commands, requires, calls his people to, and strengthens them to perform: which when they do they may be said to abound, and to be fruitful in every good work: and for their encouragement it is added,

forasmuch as ye know that your labour is not in vain in the Lord;

the labour of such who were in the ministry was not in vain, but was by the Lord made useful for the conversion of sinners, and the edification of saints, who would be their joy, and crown of rejoicing another day; and which must be no small encouragement to labour; and labour in any kind of good work has here its usefulness: it is profitable unto men, and though not meritorious of eternal life, yet the good works of the saints will follow them; Christ will not forget their work and labour of love which they have shown to his name and people, but will take notice of them as fruits of his own grace, and bestow his rewards upon them, though not in a way of debt, but of grace; which the doctrine of the resurrection assures of, and encourages to hope for; and so must he a friend to the practice of good works, as the contrary doctrine must be an obstruction to them.

Also, another study note that I have found: (Jamieson, Fausset, Brown)

Commentary Critical and Explanatory:

Beloved-- Sound doctrine kindles Christian love.

Steadfast-- not turning aside from the faith of the resurrection of yourselves.

Unmovable-- not turned aside by others (1 Corinthians 15:12, Colossians 1:23).

The work of the Lord-- the promotion of Christ's kingdom (Philippians 2:30).

Not in vain-- as the deniers of the resurrection would make it (1 Corinthians 15:14,17).

In the Lord-- applying to the whole sentence and its several clauses: Ye, as being in the Lord by faith, know that your labor in the Lord (that is, labor according to His will) is not to be without its reward in the Lord (through His merits and according to His gracious appointment).

So, let us not only read the bible, but also study it, combining exegesis and eisigesis together.

Ok, I gotta run off to study.

Keep me in prayers for my studies and exams and family.
Thank you!

Merci et Au Revoir!

Looking up

2006-02-19T21:34:00.000+08:00

Was on my way to somewhere once from the office when something just strike me.. haha..

I was walking along the pavement when I saw a round yellow cover on the floor. I was wondering what that was when I looked up and saw the lamppost at the pedestrian crossing left with only a lightbulb at the very top..
So I went OHHHHH.... I see... No wonder... So that cover was for the lamp post at the pedestrian crossing..

I have no idea why it "flew" off but it reminds me of something.

Alot of times, when we look at ourselves, look at the things around us, we go," Why, WHy, Why....???"

But the moment we look up to God, we go," Ohhhhhh... I see....."....

Haha.. Very true, isn't it? At least that is how I always felt...

=)

Testimonies

2006-02-19T19:42:00.000+08:00

Have been really busy with work and studies.. Managed to blog now, while watching tv.. hehe...

Just wanna blog about 3 testimonies. 3 Testimonies of God's goodness in my life.

1) Last Friday during the combined cg meeting, Sis Kless prayed for me. She really ministered to me cos what she said was the deep felt feelings in my heart which I din really tell anyone but perhaps mentioned a lil to my sis. So, sis kless couldn't possibly know what I was really feeling unless it was by the POwer of the Holy Spirit that annointed her when she was praying for me.

So, what I was feeling: Recently, over that period of time, I was asking God almost every other day, about my "Specific" purpose in life. I mean, I know what is my purpose in life. But I wan to know it specifically, wan to know that every step I take is in line with God's plan.
And though there ARE some things I went thru that I don't understand, I know God's ways and thoughts are higher than mine and He will piece it up in His time.

Also, recently, I was reading the Book of Acts and Romans and very amazed by the POwer of the Holy Spirit upon Paul. So I was just telling God, I wan to experience the same power of the Holy Spirit, to know God more.

Then WHAT Sis Kless prayed for me:
That God has a "SPECIFIC" purpose for me. Even when I was in my mother's womb, God already has a specific purpose for me. Though I dun understand why I experienced the things I went thru, GOd will REVEAL it to me in the due season and I will experience GOd in a NEW way..

WOW!

Either Sis Kless have some special psychic power, or installed some cameras in my room when I was praying..
(*duh.. of course not!)
But I know she has neither, but is a woman of God, annointed by the Holy SPirit.
Amen.

2) Was bugged by some problems in work. Particularly one was an issue with the supplier which I have to settle. I was really very frustrated and stressed up by it.
The next day, I was still contemplating when I should call the supplier, when he called me.
(The night before, I was chatting with my sis when she shared with me that 10 times she asked God for wisdom in her major projects at work, 10 times she found the wisdom to finish the projects. Even she was amazed. Indeed, Ask and u shall receive!)

So, when I picked up the phone, I asked God for help! Help Help.. Cos I simply had no idea how I was going to open my mouth to settle it.
Surprisingly, I was able to speak sense and managed to talk over with the supplier, and managed to get what I want.
Though the issue is not settled yet, but I was amazed that I actually spoke and asked and took the first step!
THank God!

3) I PASSED my driving test!

Actually lots of things happened.. I was late for my warm-up! cos I miscalculated the time.. I was running lik mad to the driving centre. And guess wat? I actually mounted the curb during the warm-up.. I was so nervous! And cos I was late and lots of cars on the circuit, I only had very lil time practising.. I was really so nervous!

After the warm-up, on my way to the waiting room, I kept meditating on the word that God gave me. (A few days back, I asked God for a word, that will pacify my anxious heart.)

In fact, I never wanted to learn driving in the first place. But one day, I just felt prompted to go and learn. So I just went ahead. I had a rough time completing it cos my progress was slow and I just din lik driving tat much..

So, as I was saying, I was meditating on God's word when I was on my way to the waiting room... *God, who is the source of my hope, will fill my heart with peace and joy, overflowing me with confident hope, through the power of the Holy SPirit. - Rom 15:13

My heart was actually pumping very fast, and I was super nervous on the way up..

The moment I entered the room, suddenly, my nervousness and butterflies in my stomach DISAPPEARED!!!
I just smiled as I entered the room and even *yes, I did... tried to hide my giggle when I saw how nervous the rest are... Really!! I felt so relaxed at that moment and really felt the "confident hope"!! I even encouraged some of the rest in the room to stay calm and to jiayou!

Later, I even asked the tester if I could go to the toilet (and resulted in him waiting for a long time for me...) I was thinking oh no.. hahahaha.... During the test, he seldom took out the board to write. I was thinkin in my heart, either I did so well that he has nothing to write, or I already failed right on the spot...

At the end of the test, the tester turned and asked me:" This is your wat attempt?"

"Eh... my first attempt... " was my reply..

Looking at me, with a surprise look on his face, he said that he was very surprised cos I performed very well for a first timer taking test and normally he only see this kind of standard in repeated takers.

Wow!

See the grace of God?

I was not nervous, in fact even felt His confident hope flowing in me!
The tester even praised me for flaring so well!

Could I do this on my own? I doubt so...

Indeed, as I was going through the whole driving thingy.. I felt very tempted to give up. Cos it's really tough for me. But by the Grace of God, by His Mercy, and because He started this in me, He brought it to a beautiful end and completion.

GOd is good! Amazing, Awesome and Wonderful.

Thank You, God.

Book of Acts.

2006-02-03T13:39:00.000+08:00

Wahaha... really nearly laugh cry me when I received Bev's sms.

Guess what she sms me?

"...Did u really meet that guy and does that guy looked like Lee Hom... ?"

wahahaha... *This gal ahz.... hahahaha...
*diaoz....

Anyway, wahaha... really funny sia...

Just a note I couldn't resist putting: (With some of the information from Beverly and Lijun)

- Do you know that Lee Hom's English name is Alexander?
- Do you know that Lee Hom actually know French??? (Wah.. if i really meet him, i can speak to him in broken french... wooohooo...)
- Do you know that Lee Hom is so talented...? He knows drums, flute, piano, guitar, violin, dance blah blah...
- Do you know that................

Wahahaha.. Okok, this is not a blog dedicated to him so I shall stop here...

And NO, I'm NOT loony over him... I just thought he is a talented artist with a very nice voice. His latest song : Hua Tian chuo, I like it very muchy.... (The tune la... Din really go and notice the lyrics... )

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Recently was reading the book of Acts in NLT version... wow.. thank God for the Holy Spirit.

Wow... din know that I missed out so many details in the Book.

For example, I din notice the below "story" until I read the Book again.... (Acts 20)

On the first day of the week, we gathered to observe the Lord's Supper. Paul was preaching; and since he was leaving the next day, he talked until midnight. The upstairs room where we met was lighted with many flickering lamps. As Paul spoke on and on, a young man named Eutychus, sitting on the windowsill, became very drowsy. Finally, he sank into a deep sleep and fell three stories to his death below. Paul went down, bent over him, and took him into his arms. "Don't worry," he said, "he's alive!" Then they all went back upstairs and ate the Lord's Supper together. And Paul continued talking to them until dawn; then he left. Meanwhile, the young man was taken home unhurt, and everyone was greatly relieved.

SO interesting, those things that are written in the bible. =)

I love God, I love Jesus, I love Holy Spirit.

Chinese New Year!

2006-02-03T13:11:00.000+08:00

Thank God for such a wonderful Chinese New Year.
I do think it is the best chinese new year ever..

On CNY eve, my brother was helping my mom with the steamboat preparation.
Yeah, our reunion dinner was steamboat at home.

During the dinner, my dad couldn't sit still. He kept walking around. Hahaha... we had to keep asking him to sit down... It was funny.
After dinner, my sis and I helped my mom to clean up the mess we made during steamboat dinner.

Afterwhich, my brother, my sis, and I sat down for a couple of card games... Boy, it was fun, drinking soft drinks, playing games, watching tv. And guess wat? My mom was sitting by our side, cutting the Bak Gua into smaller pieces. So while she was cutting, she was feeding us too...

wah... wat a nite......

The next morning, we awake to fabulous noodle breakfast cooked by my mom. After that, we made our way to our big big aunt's house.

At her house, we had another round of fun games with our relatives..... (Not to mention, collection of.............. ANG BAOS....)

Following that, we went for a ride around Esplanade to look at the streets before hitting home.
(Of course, dinner was settled for Mc DOnalds!)

The next day, (2nd day of chinese new year), my mom cooked for my relatives and it was a good time of talking and playing with our cousins...
After dinner, we head to our small uncle house for dumplings...

Wat can I say? Delicious food cooked by my mom and uncle's wife!!!!

After the whole session, we arrived back at home, tired but still having the energy to clean up the house.

The third day, my mom and dad went out, leavin my bro, sis and myself at home.

After eating the buns that my mom heated up for us before she left home, we decided to play board games.
It was such a fun time together!

Then after, as a family, we headed off for Sakae sushi before returning home to rest.

The next day, I took leave, and stayed at home to study... wooohoooo.... had a small chat with Jireh... and helped my mom to prepare the food that we were going to bring to........................ KTV... yeapz.... my mom, bro, sis and me were going to KTV!

hahaha... so my mom cooked some noodle and snacks and we brought to the KTV to eat... Delicious and totally fun!

Think my bro and sis n myself can organise a band liaoz... my brother sings like Edison Chen (K-ge Zi Wang), My sis sings like Cass Phang, I sing like Coco Lee... hahaha..... wat a combination sia! ( I recorded our singings down... hm... mayb can try uploading.....? hahaha)

The best part? My mom sang Trademark's Only Love... woooohoooo... my mom is so da hip.... hehe...

So so so so so fun.... So fun tat I couldn't bear to step into a new day, leaving those memories behind.
So, I'm writing them down now. So that I can move on, and not forgetting such fun times that the Lord has blessed my family with.

Thank You God!

The Women in Christ's Life: Anna, The Prophetess

2006-01-28T17:01:00.000+08:00

The Women in Christ's Life: Anna, The Prophetess
By Kris Swiatocho - The Singles Network Ministries

......I want to share with you about some of the other women who have impacted my life solely because of their relationship with Jesus. I believe as I share, you too will connect with them and discover for yourself how God has always had a plan for you, is working it out in your life and will never leave you.

"Don't you know you're a woman – a young woman? Widowed? This place isn't for you. Go home and darn socks, take care of your family and leave the ministry stuff to us men!"

Have you ever heard these words before? Have you ever felt that your life wasn't as important as others'? You didn't have the right training or knowledge that other people have? Or perhaps you didn't feel as equipped to handle the job? Maybe you were uncertain of your purpose.

I understand because I have been there.

For many years, while running a graphic design business I also volunteered in various single adult ministries. As the years passed, I became more and more involved, to the point that I had to make a decision about going into full-time ministry.

I had some fears and doubts because 1) I was a women 2) I was single 3) I didn't feel adequately educated or equipped. I let my insecurities direct a lot of my choices. I was more concerned with what the world was saying versus God.
God told me to go into full-time ministry. God told me that he would equip me. God told me I was equally valued in his Kingdom. That I had a purpose and a plan. Now I just had to believe him.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you." — Jeremiah 29:11-12

Anna: A Woman With Purpose

Anna, a prophet, was also there in the Temple. She was the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher, and was very old. She was a widow, for her husband had died when they had been married only seven years.

She was now eighty-four years old. She never left the Temple but stayed there day and night, worshiping God with fasting and prayer.
She came along just as Simeon was talking with Mary and Joseph, and she began praising God. She talked about Jesus to everyone who had been waiting for the promised King to come and deliver Jerusalem. — Luke 2:36-38

Anna was not like most women of her time. She chose a different path.

More than likely, after her husbands death, Anna would have been encouraged to get married again and have children. Anna, instead, chose to stay single.
She chose to share her faith to as many people as she could.
She chose to serve the Lord.
She chose to fast and pray, worshiping the Lord day and night.
She chose to tell them the news of the Savior that was coming, no matter how long it might be before he came.

She knew her purpose and she didn't let anyone's opinions or comments keep her from it. Anna's choice would not only affect her life in an abundant way, but also the lives of others ever since.

What I've Learned From Anna

I would have love to have been a fly on the wall to watch Anna through her 84 years. How she might have shared her pain of losing her husband, being single, and relying on others financially. To also see her share her joy, hope and security in Jesus Christ.

1. She didn't give up.

There have been times in my ministry that I have wanted to give up. Being on the road can get hard. You miss your friends, your church and your community.
Sometimes churches cancel, leaving you without finances and resources. Sometimes you get lonely, sick and exhausted.

But like Anna, I have also experienced many positives that far outweigh the negatives. I have met so many people who have encouraged me. I have also witnessed many come to Christ and recommit to him. Just think of Anna and how for at least 60 or more years she was able to share her faith with so many people. God's timing is truly perfect. Think about it.

If Christ had come the first day she was widowed, how many people would have never heard the message of salvation. We must never give up.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.— Hebrews 12:1-3

2. She did what God told her to do.

Anna was told by God what to do and she did it. How about you? Has God told you to do something but you are afraid? Lazy? Being disobedient? The blessings of being obedient far outweigh the blessings of staying safe.

Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever.— 1 Peter 4:10-11

3. She taught me about being strong.

Despite her husband's death, she exemplified that even in the worse of circumstances God is with us. She taught me that you can be used by God no matter who you are, what situation you're in – married or single, rich or poor.

Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life; you stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes, with your right hand you save me. The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever – do not abandon the works of your hands.— Psalm 138:7-9

4. God provided for Anna.

Anna knew from past experience that the Lord answers prayers. Being a widow, Anna, had to rely on others to feed and clothe her. God provided for her. Wow, this means God is going to provide for you.

My steps have held to your paths; my feet have not slipped. I call on you, O God, for you will answer me; give ear to me and hear my prayer.– Psalm 17:5-6

5. Fasting produces results.

Recently I spoke at a church where everyone was doing the "Daniels Fast" ... eating only fruit, vegetables and nuts. Although I sure some were tempted to go off the fast, there seem to be an ease to doing it. Well, as a body of believers, it is always easier to do things together.

However, Anna fasted all alone. What strength she must have had to do this. She truly didn't care what "man" thought, but what God thought. Have you ever tried to fast? I once fasted my TV. I felt it was an addiction so I cut the cord three times, only to re-wire it. Fasting is more difficult than it seems.

Paul and Barnabas appointed elders for them in each church and, with prayer and fasting, committed them to the Lord, in whom they had put their trust.— Acts 14:22

6. She was committed.

Anna was committed to telling everyone about the coming Savior, no matter how long it was going to take.

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they are good for us – they help us learn to endure.

And endurance develops strength of character in us, and character strengthens our confident expectation of salvation. And this expectation will not disappoint us. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.— Romans 5:3-5

7. She had a lot of courage.

I am sure Anna spoke to some people that didn't want to hear. But she kept moving forth, telling about Christ coming. She had courage to do this alone.

Be on guard. Stand true to what you believe. Be courageous. Be strong.— 1 Corinthians 16:13

8. She was a strong witness for Christ.

Anna showed me how important it is to tell others about Christ in all situations. Whether I am at a restaurant, getting my car fixed, at the doctor's or talking to my neighbor.

And now, dear children, continue to live in fellowship with Christ so that when he returns, you will be full of courage and not shrink back from him in shame.— 1 John 2:28

9. She listened to God for direction.

Anna didn't let anyone tell her who she was in Christ. She listened to God to tell her who she was and the direction he wanted to send her.

So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view. Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!— 2 Corinthians 5:16-17

10. Anna understood what patience meant.

She waited for Christ to come despite the many years that had past. I am not sure I could have waited that long, especially considering there wasn't any retirement fund.

We also pray that you will be strengthened with his glorious power so that you will have all the patience and endurance you need. May you be filled with joy, always thanking the Father, who has enabled you to share the inheritance that belongs to God's holy people, who live in the light.— Colossians 1:11-12

Here it goes!

2006-01-28T14:56:00.000+08:00

Chinese New Year le!

Haha...

Itinery for Chinese New Year....:

THe week before CNY - Tidy house!
CNY eve - Reunion dinner and then watch TV
CNY day 1 - Visit my Big Big aunt's place
CNY day 2 - Relatives visit my mom's house
CNY day 3 - This year, mayb my sis's cg will be coming
CNY day 4 - I took leave! yeahz! Hahahaha.... wooohooooo....

Tidyin up the house is a "nightmare" to me. Cos I have a different definition of tidyin up the house from my sis. My sis's definition of "Neat" is hiding any mess in the house from everyone else's eyes.
My definition of "Neat"..... As long as it's not messy, can already la....
COs i mean, if u daily have to use the items, why hide it? on the table then on the table lo.. It's your everyday table wat, y hide everything then after CNY have to dig it out again?

Haiz... But there is always give and take since we live together.. haha.. over the years, I have gotten use to her "Neat" definition and tried to keep my things the "best" that I know how to. And she had stopped hounding me to keep everything. But accepted that my table likes to be "natural"... Naturally messy..... hehehe....

Hahaahahaha...

Take for today, she came into my room to "inspect" it and to my amazement, normally, she would give lotsa comments. But this time, she actually said that it was quite neat... I was surprised. Cos she actually accepted my "natural" table.

I went into her room after that to check out how neat she tidied up... And ya... Clean.. really clean.. and hiding every possible mess from the eyes of anyone.

hahaha.. okok, wat am i doing, talking about tidyin up rooms... But it's funny, when ppl of different styles get together to work. There's alot of give and take but in the midst, we learnt alot.

*Ya.. my sis just came in and asked me to tidy up the corner of my room which is just too messy.... gosh..... ahz...... *helpz...

*My sister, on various timings, tried creeping into my room, by sticking herself to the wall, to sneak in... to read what I'm writing on my blog. Normally, we only allow each other to read after we completed it. And she thought I din see her coming in.
HELLO!!!!!??? I not a big sotong like u LOR!!

Ok la.. my sis can be very sharp.... *at times....
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Met up with my Poly friends yest and one of them tried to "matchmake" me with another guy friend that he brought along.

Before he reached, i had a conversation with another friend:

She: Wat type of guys u like?
Me: eh.... LEE HOM!!! hahaha... Handsome, talented.... blah blah....
She: Wat if that guy (tat my friend was trying to "matchmake" me with) is like Lee Hom?
Me: No way... Even if yes, I wun wan...
She: WHY NOT? *surprised...
Me: COs I just dun wan.... dun wan dun wan dun wan.........

But my point being.. Haiz... Friends, STOP "MATCHMAKING" ME......
I know I'm not "young" anymore... butz... pls lo...

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I remembered last time, when I was praying and asking God about my purpose in life, I received this below verse. John 21:15-17

After breakfast Jesus said to Simon Peter, "Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?"
"Yes, Lord," Peter replied, "you know I love you."
"Then feed my lambs," Jesus told him.
Jesus repeated the question: "Simon son of John, do you love me?"
"Yes, Lord," Peter said, "you know I love you."
"Then take care of my sheep," Jesus said.
Once more he asked him, "Simon son of John, do you love me?"
Peter was grieved that Jesus asked the question a third time. He said, "Lord, you know everything. You know I love you." Jesus said, "Then feed my sheep."

Recently, when I was setting goals for my new year, this verse came back to me again.
I pray, that if this is indeed the verse for my life, God whom is my Lord, will provide me with the love and strength, and annointing to Tend and to feed His sheeps and Lambs.

Praise the Lord!

PERFECT LOVE (I ADORE)

2006-01-19T10:45:00.000+08:00

So many things, so many thoughts, so many emotions...
But the below song probably sums it all up. There's nothing more I want than to sit at His Feet and adore Him.

By: CCC

IT’S YOU I ADORE
JESUS MY LORD
AND ALL I WANT IS TO SIT AT YOUR FEET
NOTHING MORE

YOUR PERFECT LOVE
HUNG ON A CROSS
YOU PAID THE PRICE FOR MY LIFE
I LONG TO KNOW JESUS MY SAVIOUR

I ADORE… YOU
I ADORE… YOU
I ADORE… YOU
JESUS MY LORD

Thank You, Lord

2006-01-08T00:22:00.000+08:00

Just realised that I have yet to thank God for alot of things that happened in year 2005.

1) First and foremost!!! The Christmas Production. It was like a dream come true. TO dance for God! Though it was tedious and utterly tiring, I thank God for the strength and enlargement of my capacity to go through the practices and performance. I thank God for the chance to dance for Him and glorify His Name.

2) I thank God for the job in my current company. A place where I can gain experience, learn alot of things and have quite a good relationship with the colleagues. (Christian colleagues who practically encouraged me! How's tat for a change?!)

3) Sentosa testimony. Where we found the car keys. Super amazed and thank God. It must be an angel who pointed out the car keys to us!

4) Thank God that I can further my studies now. Thank God for bringing me thru the times where I had to struggle to attend classes and to study for my exam. It weren't easy but with God, all things are possible.

5) Thank God for His Word and encouragements and Holy Spirit. For guidance and love, hope and light.

I have alot to thank God for and to name all of those offhand would be a real challenge.
*Given my forgetfulness and scatterbrain...... Yet, improving, improving... my brain is...

So, to name a few, would be the above.

Ahz, time to set new resolutions and goals for Year 2006.

I do believe, this will be the best year................... YET.

Hand pain la!

2006-01-08T00:10:00.000+08:00

While practicing guitar, I scrapped a piece of my finger's skin off the guitar strings. DUn ask me how I managed that cos I would think u r being Sar-cars-tic!

Haha... just kidding.. How I managed to scrap the piece of my skin off my strings? Think I strummed too "violently" and wrong angle caused my skin to come into contact with the strings and it took my skin off.. *SHows that I'm still a novice... In case u r wondering which piece of the skin, it's the one just above the nails. Anyway, blood stained the strings and the first thing I did was to wipe the blood off the strings instead of my finger... My guitar is my baby... My finger's "injury" wasn't so serious so I attended to my guitar first.... hehe...

Actually now typing got some difficulties cos hand is plastered la... the second finger lo...

SO the lesson learnt? Haiz... Pain pain still got to practice.. waaaahahahahaha....
Be more careful lo.....

Just got off the phone with Bev actually.. hehe.. urging her to update her blog..
Hello gal, heard that? heeheee.. lookin forward to uploading your songs to my blog... =p

KTV next week ahz... hehe....

What else? I want to go and sleep le.. hehe....
*Remembered that I got something else to blog.... but can't remember... Anyway... ya laz...

Realisation

2006-01-07T23:07:00.000+08:00

First of all, I wanna thank Shufen for giving me the book "Joy for the Journey".

It has encouraged me greatly and indeed is the message for the season for me.
With the Word, it comes confirmation, from Dr Joyce Meyer's conference.

To talk about a passage written in the book:

Finding Joy in your work.

Work should always be associated with joy.
The story is told of 3 women washing clothes.
A passerby asked each what she was doing,

"Washing clothes" was the first answer.
"A bit of household drudgery" was the second.
"I'm mothering 2 young children who someday will fill important and useful spheres in life, and washday is a part of my grand task in caring for these souls who shall live forever" was the third.

Ordinary work, which is what most of us do most of the time, is ordained by God as every bit as much as is the extraordinary. All work done for God is spiritual work and therefore not merely a duty but a holy priviledge.

Another excerpt:

Finding holiness in the Ordinary

Henri Nouwen, in his book Out of Solitude, tells of an old Notre Dame professor who had always complained that his work was constantly being interrupted. Like so many of us, he longed for the freedom to concentrate fully on what he considered important. Late in his life, however, the professor came to realize what he wished he had known all along: that the interruptions were his work...

The interruptons are the work. The pieces are the whole. We cannot wait for a total, personal revelation of all that God has for us to be handed down in one lump sum. God reveals Himself to us bit by spiritual bit. Even our broadest visions and our highest goals, once we know them, must be broken down and lived out in the small particulars of our everyday lives if they are to have meaning.

End of excerpt.

From those passages, you should have guessed that the problem which I am having right now is coping with the expectation that I have with regards to my work.

In fact, I missed by a fraction, to despising what I do at work.
With the recent transition in my work place, I began to seriously examine why I was there and doing the things that I was doing.

I did not have job satisfaction and began to yearn for more, wishing that I was doing something else instead of those. Wishing that I was somebody else that I wasn't..

Though I was still effective and efficient in what I did, somehow, I felt that I lost the joy, the spirit of excellence, and the faithfulness.

After reading the book, I felt encouraged. To be faithful, even in the little things. Even in the ordinary work, it can be holy unto the Lord.
To quote what Dr Joyce Meyer said," God wants us to do the ordinary things in supernatural way!".

Today, I was tremendously inspired and encouraged by what Dr Joyce shared.
What a great message to start off the year!
As I spoke with Joel, he asked me how I felt about the message. I said it was so timely.
Joel said," It was long-needed.".
I thought so too. The content of the message was about loving yourself, loving your life, and enjoying what you are doing.
I believe that is a message where alot of people needs to hear and will change their lives tremendously.

I hope u will bear with me cos I can't help but write down all those things that have impacted me.
Indeed, faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God. I should suppose that I knew those stuff and principles already. But when I heard Dr Joyce said it again, faith arose in my heart.
I felt that I have to make a decision. To really walk the walk and not just talk the talk.

It is true, you know, that if I am not happy where I am right now, even when God promotes me, I will not be happy still. Cos I will have a thought that I will only be happier if I can get another promotion. Like this, I can never be happy. Cos to quote the bible, we should have the joy of the Lord, and not the joy of the circumstances.

Of course, happy not meaning that you be contented. But be happy with what you are doing right now, cos that is where you are and where God placed u in at that point of time.
If fact, God knows what we are doing at that point of time. And when the time of promotion comes, He will reveal it to us.

Do not do what the Lord has never intended for us to do/have.

What amazes me further, is the truth in the below sentence:

People are unhappy most of the time, cos most of the time, they think about how to make themselves happy. Yet, the Lord has not called us to inreach. But to Outreach.

Hence, the next time u get unhappy, reach out to someone and encourage them. Make the difference in their lives, and you will be happier.

There are actually alot of opportunities for us to do good and make the difference in people's life. The point in question? Our self-centerness. Sometimes, the biggest barrier of all, is ourselves.

You know, if what you have is what you've got, you just have to work around with it.

One simple sentence Dr Joyce Meyer said, which I totally agree.

I met Jesus and He changed my life.

It's a simple sentence with much emotions and truth attached to it.

Watched a documentary show just now. Not sure if you caught it. But it's about the addiction to gambling.

This gambling addict was sent to jail due to his embezzlement of company funds to pay off gambling debts (I should think that was how he was sent to jail..)
Through rain or shine, his parents ever so faithfully visited him in jail.
Christians also visited him in jail to talk to him about the Good News.

He felt that he had to repent and did not want to let his parents down. He changed and since then was a changed man.

When I saw a snippet of the film of how he worshipped God, I thanked God for His mercy and grace towards us right there and then. How great God is. Changed our lives and gave us new hope and light.

In short and in conclusion:

1) Be faithful even in the little things. God placed me in that place at that time. Let me do things with the joy of the Lord, love myself, love my life, and enjoy what I am doing.

2) Stop thinking all about making myself happier. Start taking myself off my mind and reach out to others, serve them, listen, encourage them and be for them. Dun just talk the talk. Walk the walk and show them Jesus.

3) Do what you are talented and good in. Stop yearning to be someone whom u ain't and wishing to be like them. You are special and lovely, and unique. Love yourself (but kick that self-centerness.)

*Hope you have yet to fall asleep and is still enjoying my writings.

To end off with some scriptures:

"Whatever you do, do it heartily as to the Lord and not to men."
-Col 3:23

"In all labor there is profit."
-Prov 14:23

Bookshop Vs Shopping

2006-01-05T21:28:00.000+08:00

2 of my colleagues left the company.. Due to that, my another colleague and I had extra work scope to cover. Hence, getting busier and busier...

I can learn alot from this new job scope, and get to know more people.

It's just that with the departure of 2 colleagues, and the starting of my school next next week, thoughts of my future starts to come back to me...
Thinking about what my future is going to be like... and what is the next step that I should take.

Well, I will plan, and God will direct. =)

Actually, I wasn't going to blog now... esp after facing the computer for a whole day, it would be even more straining on the eyes... but yaz.. still decided to login.. to blog on today's stuff...

Met up with Lili, shufen they all just now.. Had Burger King for dinner... Dinner was a series of laughter that caused the guy to look down on the floor and the gals to giggle even more.
*chuckle...

Before meeting them, i reached Raffles city earlier...
First, I went to Esprit... I was thinkin that, aiyahz.. me not a shopping queen, no harm takin a stroll in the shop... turns out that a piece of jacket caught my attention and I was so tempted to buy it...
But I can almost imagine ppl's voices in my head commenting, "Eh, weather veri cold, issit?"...

Okok, better get out of the shop before I put my hands to my wallet to buy a seemingly-winter-look-alike-vest...

My next destination? The moment I saw the bookshop, i heaved a sigh of relief.. Finally, a place where I can be comfortable in...

I feasted my eyes on a couple of books.. First I went to the Travel section.. rested my eyes on the French book... The pictures reminded me of my France trip... Awesome!
There were some french words at the back and being a French-lover, I tried practicing my broken french right there and then, when I was done with it, I realised a lady was looking at me, half staring and in curiosity...
Either she thought I was a self-muttering nuts, or impressed with my broken french. Either way, *Wadever.... hehe...

Then I headed to the Singapore Section.. the Book which our SM Mr Lee Kuan Yew wrote...
Interesting and very wise, I should say.
Hm... I was pretty fascinated by their stories and the way they handle situations.
You have to admit that they are brilliant at wat they do.

Read about Xiaxue's blog today.. the famous, popular and controversial blogger...
Me not going to comment anything cos I dun wan "Pro-Xiaxue" or "Anti-Xiaxue" "fans" to come and tear down my blog in case they are loitering around...
*I would prefer to keep my blog's serenity and tranquility...

You know, I never really lik dressing up.. To me, it's so bothersome... I just like to wear something comfy and go out... Make-ups? Big No Nos....
It takes a big decision to really dress up and hit the streets.. Recently, lots of ppl pester me to doll up... *yes... is my jie jie and mummy.. and faithfffyyyy....

also saw a few magazines with fashion styles, beautiful charming models, beckoning me to doll up...

SO yaz... will try but no promise...

Had a super weird dream yest nitez... not gonna share it but take it that it's true when I say, it's super weird!

*Going to rest my eyes now..Blood shot eyes appearing le...

Nitez ppl... Bonne nuit..

Je parle un petit peu francais et J'aime France!
C'est tous!

Western food

2006-01-04T17:10:00.000+08:00

So happy.. my mummy, together with my kor kor is going to cook western food for us to eat later!
woooohooooo...

The western food that they cook is not like fish and chips or those chicken chop...
My family type of western food consist of ham, a sunnyside up, fries, cucumber, tomato, beans... etc etc...
You may think tat it can hardly fill up the stomach. But no no... it can feed a hungry person to the brim.

So looking forward to going home later... Dun care.. not going to work OT today.. yest worked till around 8pm...
Workload getting heavier and heavier... Calls non-stop, email alerts alerting every few seconds, people coming to your desk...

Sometimes really wish I can smash the phone, computer, and people..... *opppsss... did i said/wrote people??

*email alert popped up

Anyway, that was just a "joke" la....
Me not going to smash the phone or computer or people.....

*Someone came to my desk

But me going to work hard, doing things with efficiency and effectiveness, being the problem solver, not problem giver.
Muz have the spirit of excellence, and be faithful, even in the little things.

*Email alert popped up again..

Anyway, I still miss the sentosa trip... u might have read my sis's blog, about the testimony etc.. me going to update about the sentosa trip soon... hopefully..

Meantime..... *Email alert popped up again...

I'M GOING TO PACK UP AND LEAVE THE IRRITATING EMAILS...........

*Phone Ringing.......

*Hello..... blah blah blah.... Hang up...

Ok, me going to fill up my bottle, go and pack up and leave on the dot.. If I dun do just that, something urgent will crop up at 5.30pm and requires me to stay till, say.... 8pm?

Not tat my work is super busy... In fact, in comparison, my workload is quite ok bahz... hehe.. me just rattling off laz...

Western food... yummy.... later can relac liaoz... hehe....

Gatherings

2006-01-01T17:27:00.000+08:00

Well, met up with faith on last tues, and bing and hui on last Wed.

Thanks gals, for the presents... me really like it alot and appreciate u all v much.

On last thurs, my mom came to meet me up and we had a great time lunchin together, then we set off for a shoppin spree at the metro sale at expo.

The things were really cheap...
Imagine, a Goldlion shirt selling for about 20 over bucks?
Wat about this, ladies undergarments selling for at least half the price below the original selling price...?
With other goodies going on... it's crazy to enter the place without buying any stuff...

And so, my mom was happily pickin up stuff and puttin it into the shoppin bag. I warned her cheekily upfront that she had better not "anyhow" take.. better decide carefully even though is so cheap.. or else at the end of the day, though the items are cheap, the total price could b totallin up to hundreds of dollars if u dun control..

So yaz.. had a great time with my mom tat day...

*still moaning over the lost of my old blogger skin template.. ahhhzzz... Make no haste when u r makin a decision and better make sure u know wat u r in for.

Blogger skin changed

2006-01-01T17:14:00.000+08:00

Dunno lei.... had been wantin a new change in my template... something simpler..

then when i was lookin thru at the templates... i "blurly" clicked ok when it asked if i wanted to replace my template and the additions I've made to my blog...

so yaz.... this blog has a new skin which i reluctantly had to keep it since i dun wanna modify the skin liaoz...

*faintz.....

After Christmas......

2005-12-27T12:30:00.000+08:00

"Laughter: the knee-slapping, eye-watering, straight-from-the-belly kind."

Christmas 2005 is gone just like that, in a flash...

Well, how did I celebrate Christmas? Hm... busy with rehearsals. Was really tired and stretched. But now that it is over, really missed the practices and some of the friends.

Actually, things were getting on fine. But on sat, 24th dec, disappointments after disappointments hit me in the face. Until I asked God, how many disappointments can I face in a day?

Thank God, I met laiyin on my way to the second performance of the day, and she gave me such a warm bear hug. I nearly teared but controlled.

A warm hug in times of sorrow, is priceless.

Though I nearly teared, I have to appear really happy on stage.. hahaha... That's one of the best things I learnt. Gotta control ur emotions. I cannot bring my emotions up the stage. I have to express the emotions appropriate for the occasion and music. Not being fake but being professional. (Not sayin that I am professional... haha.. but saying that this is important for performers as their mood and expression affect the audiences and performance as well.)

But really, the moment I stepped onto the stage, adjusted my emotions and I became as happy as I could, dancing for God, for Jesus, for the Holy Spirit. Funz!
Felt lik all sorrows disappeared as I danced for the Lord. Like what my sis always say, our dance is an offering to the Lord. Praise the Lord!

On sunday, after the last performance, we celebrated Bro Ryan's birthday. And Bro Ryan together with Bro Kenny and Sis Andrea gave us each a card and a sock (socks for sisters. Boxers for brothers.)..... so nice of them! Another dancer.. the one in bird costume, gave each of us a milk bath bottle... wow.. tat's really so sweet of her too!!!

After the whole thing, I sat down with my 2 friends, and we were talkin about how we would miss each other and the practices.. haha.. though relieved that the performances and "stressful" trainings were over.. there were a tinge of sadness in the air.... *yi yi bu she.......

but ya.. lik wat Bro Ryan said and wat I have come to realise over the years, things end so that new beginnings can come. If this never end, greater things can never materialise. So, we must always look forward and toward.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank u jie jie for being so understandin and helping me with so many things. Your encouragement and love means so much and made things so much easier for me.

Gary... thank u for brightening up my times at the rehearsal.. haha... always so happy to see u and talk to u... u r like a big brother, takin care of me. Hehe..

My mom came to the service and enjoyed the drama tremendously. She even said that she's not had enough and wanted to sit in another service. But she was so hungry so she went to grab some lunch instead.. haha.. the way my mom laughed and enjoyed herself and full of anticipation for next year's christmas production - Priceless.

Btw Gary, my mom loves the 3 wise men... hahahaha.. ;p

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Had a good time of hanging out with the cg, shufen and yong feng at the carnival before heading home.. hehe...

When I reached home on sunday, my dad promised a seafood dinner at East coast, Long Beach... hehe... crabs, prawns... yummy... hehe...

Was a good time of get together with my family.

We saw a bizzare phenomenal.. Well, it sure looks something lik tat to me.. will upload the photo again.. anyone can explain y the scene scientifically? hehehe....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yesterday arrived in my office to see a handful of christmas presents on my table, given by my colleagues.. really so nice of them.. haha...

After work, went to meet Faith... hehe... Rosti! yummy.. hehe...
aiyahz... me really love this friend.
Such a sweetie and dearie.. hehe... ;p
Faittthhhfffffyyyyy...... hehehehe....

Well, lookin forward to meeting up with bing n hui tonite.. hehe..
=)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

** You are only as strong as your weakest link when you are in a team.
** Do not crack under pressure. Explode to your best instead.

Christmas Present!

2005-12-19T17:06:00.000+08:00

Just received a christmas present from a very nice Buyer, my colleague.
Really very nice of her.

The present ahz... looks like a shawl... looks like a belt.. mayb can use it interchangeably? hehehehe... =p

Christmas! 6 days to Christmas?

2005-12-19T15:35:00.000+08:00

Notes to ppl:

So looking forward to meeting Hippo Pootzzy, and also Hui and Bing next week... heezzz.... =p

Gary, hehe.. was nice to see u yesterday worz... sorry that I took off halfway thru our conversation. Me got a shock when I saw them debriefing.. so I just rushed away without a proper goodbye.. sorry ahz.... hehe... and thanks for the very warm offer to help me find ppl to share cab with... Very nice of u! Thanks thanks, bro!

Nicole... din know tat u read my blog until yest.. rem to gimme ur blog address too.... heeeezzz...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

hehe... just now was munching on a very nice fruit.. not sure wat the name is but i adore this fruit. Delicious!
Really so blessed to have a mummy like my mummy, who cuts fruits for me on some mornings to bring it to work.
*Yummy....

I like the poster pasted on my door. It talks about Thanking God even on the smallest thing. To quote an example, I can thank God for the many dirty dishes that I sometimes have to wash at night.
Why? Because my mom cooked delicious food for me and I have my family to eat dinner together with me. So blessed already.

~~**Friday Cg**~~

Long time never play guitar in cg, was trying to catch up with Gerald and to fix my rusty 16beats at the same time....
brought the wrong pick cos I forgot to bring the softer pick... (cos I stil hv difficulty playing 16 beat with a harder pick...) hand nearly cramped... hehe... but thank God that I had time to practice before cg.

During Worship, I felt the sweet presence of the Lord in the room. Felt the peace, and the love that touched my heart.

Bro Isa ministered to us and what he said to me was exactly what I have been asking God for the past few days and weeks.

To have strength that I never have before. Not letting my weak body limit myself, but having strength and enlargement of capacity to do more.

To have the word of knowledge and wisdom, that when I speak to others, my words will be guided by the Holy Spirit, piercing into the person's heart and life (positively of course), ministering to them at the same time.

Amen.

::::*~Saturday Service~*::::

Wahhh.... Candlelight service!!!!!! woooohoooooo..... the moment that we have been waiting for... keke...

When the candles lit up, I was like waaaahhh... waaahhhh.. waaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... wat a pretty sight it was.

I was tryin to take in the beautiful sights and wonderful songs that I forgot to take pictures with my phone... WHo took pictures? Can send me a copy?
heeeeee.....

^"~Sunday~"^

Was pretty sad... Cos I missed out on Lili, Bro Qing Yuan, Bro Ziwei, Bro Ryan, Shuxian and some others who were having SOT graduation.
But yaz, gotta support my sister for her dance performance which was around the same time as SOT graduation... so Yaz....
Anybody got photos? me wanna see!!!!

Well, my sis's dance performance was at Neptune Theatre, those kind where u can eat and see performances at the same time.
She performed ballet and wah.... her dance skills really improved alot... Not bad! She dances very well now.
But yaz... her improvements come from hard work and practice. My sis practiced alot at home and at the dance studio too.. So, the improvement came at a price but with a sweet taste. =)

Btw, the service at the restaurant was horrible.
Last year when I went, the orange juice was free. So I thought this time the cup of orange juice would b FOC too. I asked the waitress for the orange juice and she asked back rudely," You PAY for it issit? It's not free HOR". I got such a rude shock. I mean, Hello... even if it's not free and i gotta pay for it, can use a better tone or not..? Can b more polite? No need so sacarstic right? *faintz.... So i asked for the chinese tea since it's the only free drink available... and I had to ask her for about 3 to 4 times before she brought the chinese tea to the table.... *sianzzz.....

Anyway, after watching her performance, we went for a snack and I proceeded to the dance practice le.

Was a lil sad cos my family was going to eat Penang Buffet... though my mom told me today that it wasn't such a spread... but still, felt that I missed out on something....

Dance practice was ok, the whole dance was nearly finished and was trying to get the steps cleaned up.

My stamina actually not so good so whenever i exercise vigoriously and out of breath, i would feel lik vomiting and coughin... then yest, halfway thru the dance practice, i felt lik vomiting and coughin..
Muz try to improve my stamina liaoz... and of course not dance on an empty stomach.... hehe....

It's about stretching yourself, renewing your mind, and overcoming obstacles to achieve more.

Btw, saw the dance costumes and there was this guy who made a super funny remark... Throughout his whole tryout on the costume, I was trying hard to suppress my laughter.... waaahahaha... FUNNY!!
*diaoz...

Well, it is really "tai xia shi nien gong, tai shang san fen zhong." It takes long time to practice and only a few minutes on stage for a performance.
The time of preparation? Always tough. But the fruit of the preparation can be very sweet and rewarding. Guess this should b true for quite alot of cases?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Whom have I in Heaven but You? And there is none upon earth that I desire besides You. My flesh and my heart fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."

- Ps 73:25-26

From the song: "I see The Lord".

I see the Lord,
seated on the Throne, Exalted
And the Train of His Robe
fills the Temple with Glory
the whole earth is filled
the whole earth is filled
the whole earth is filled
with Your Glory.

Photo time! My Birthday

2005-12-15T21:41:00.000+08:00

Here are some photos from my birthday.
Unable to load some up.. Not sure wat's the problem but yaz.. Feast ur eyes on these first bahz... =p

Heee...

Flowers and rocher from my eldest uncle.

Beautiful cards made by my cousins

My Presents!!!

My 21st Beautiful Birthday Cake! Yummy!
(Owe it to my sis who chose it!)

Angie's choice! Cg's choice of Birthday cake for me!
Wow! Purple! Angie's!

Games Time! Cg said it was easy... but...
End up everyone had to help! haha...

My 21st Birthday Card by Cg.
Made by Beverly, The talented and inspired artist!

My Beloved Birthday Present from Cg!
Crumpler! WOW!

P.s: Was trying to load more views of my Crumpler sling bag and the final view of the game that the cg and I pieced up together. But somehow got some problem with my blogger.. Anyway, I love my cg and my birthday was such a blast cos of them! Wooohooo...

Thank you, my dearie spiritual family. =)

Funny Story

2005-12-15T13:04:00.000+08:00

The below story taken from:
"A Slice of life - Produced and presented by Eugene Loh."

There once was a king who favoured one of his advisors very much because he was very wise and always gave useful advice. The king took him along wherever he went.

One day, the king was bitten on the finger by a dog, and the wound quickly got infected. He asked the advisor if it was a bad sign. The advisor said, "This is good!"

The king's finger subsequently got so badly infected that it had to be amputated. The king asked the advisor again if this was a bad sign. Again, he said "This is good!" By this time, the king had lost his patience and sent the advisor to prison.

One day, the king went hunting in the jungle. In pursuit of a deer, he ventured deeper and deeper into the jungle, where he got lost. To make matters worse, he was captured by the natives who lived inside the jungle. They were about to sacrifice him to their god, but when they noticed that the king was one finger short, they released him immediately. Apparently, he was no longer a "whole" person and was deemed unsuitable for sacrifice.

The king finally understood his advisor's wise response "This is good!". If he hadn't been bitten by the dog, he wouldn't have lost his finger, and if he hadn't lost his finger, he would have been sacrificed by the natives.

He ordered the release of the advisor and apologized to him. But to the king's amazement, the advisor was not upset at all. Instead, he said, "It was a good thing you had me locked up."

"And why is that?" asked the monarch.

And the advisor replied, "Because if you hadn't locked me up, I would have followed you into the jungle. And since you were unsuitable for sacrifice, the natives would have offered me up instead!"

Nothing that happens in this world can be judged as absolutely good or bad. Taken in the right spirit, everything that happens can eventually lead to a positive thing. So when something unfortunate happens to you, don't despair? it might turn out to be a blessing after all.

2005-12-13T10:35:00.000+08:00

*~Bro Vict and Sis Yv's wedding~*

So happy that I could help out by ushering.
The moment Sis Yv stepped out into the hall, I was like gaping, jaws wide open. So pretty! Like a princess!

To be honest, sis kless, if u're reading this.... i really feel tat ur playing is annointed. Can consider going into music ministry? hehe..

The way Bro Vict and Sis Yv were gazing at each other when Pastor Tan was talking - Priceless...
So Sweet!

At the tea reception, so happy that my sis n i managed to take a picture with Bro Vict and Sis Yv... COs they were surrounded by so many ppl.. haha..
Met Faith and as usual, pretty Faith Faith!! hehe...

..._Exam_...

After the tea reception, rushed down for my exam. Cabs were nowhere in sight so had to ask my sis to gimme a ride. Thank u jie jie.

Outside the examination hall, I readjusted my emotions with success. hehe..
How was my exam? Well, I wrote wat I remembered, period.

Thank you Sandra and Yong Qing.. hehe.. for the birthday present yeahz!! haaaa...

~^*Sunday Service*^~

Sunday service, wow! Tears filled my eyes when Pastor Kong preached to the part where Baby Dayan called out "Dada, Dada".
The love and protection that a father has for his baby, is so amazing. How much more the love that our heavenly Father has for us, His children!

Abba Father!

I know I can trust my Heavenly Father with my life and I do feel so protected and safe in His arms, knowing that all things are in His Hands, and for a purpose.
In the absence of fear, there is love, power, and sound mind.

Let me not fear but be an overcomer, a problem-solver.

~~**Dancing**~~

Went for dance practice immediately after sunday makeup service.
Afterwhich, we practiced all the way till 10.30 - 11pm...

I can only describe 1 word for my present state. EXHAUSTED.

There is a few more dance practices this week. I mean, if I have school instead, I also have to go school a few times a week..
The difference? School exhaust more of my brains, Dance exhaust more of my body/physical strength.

Dancing requires much discipline and giving of all your energy during practices.
So everytime after dance practice.... I collapse onto my bed.

These few days of lack of sleep and long hours of contact lens in my eyes have caused my sensitive eyes to be subjected to itch, pain and swell.
"AAAHHHHHHH......."

I really admire the dancers from dance ministry.
Sometimes, we only see their glorious moments. But we often do not see the sweat and pain that they had went through in order to put up a magnificient dance item. I'm respecting and appreciating them even more.

So tempted to take MC for my swollen eyes and tired body.. hehe.. But no laz.. might have to take leave for rehearsals next week... so yaz...

And no, I'm not complaining. In fact, I am enjoying those dance practices and so glad that my dance skills are being sharpened under Bro Ryan.

Just that I am really tired... hehe..
Please pray for me. Cos I dun want my limitations to stop me from doing more for God. I want enlarged capacity!!!
Of course in the meantime, I am just trying to get as much rest I can and taking care of myself... Gotta stay healthy!

And yaz, time to get back to work.........

..................11 days to Christmas.

"For God so loved the world that He gave His One and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him."

- John 3:16-17

That's what Christmas is about, isn't it?
The Birth of Jesus Christ, our Savior.

Snowman Cartoons - Calvin and Hobbes

2005-12-06T16:12:00.000+08:00

21st Birthday!

2005-12-05T10:49:00.000+08:00

Well, yest was my 21st birthday... hehe... How fast time pass right? I was still laughing at my friends tat they are 21 le while I am stil 20 years old..
Then yest Bing Bing just sms and said, "...is finally your turn le...." waaahahaha... laugh cry me... hahahaha...

Hm, how I celebrated my birthday ahz? Well, had a birthday buffet on sat wit my relatives... was a good time of get together... hehe.. not to mention all the presents i received... wahahaha...
received a purple handbag... wahaha.. purple lor, of course i like it! also a set of accessories, also, a white gold necklace, and a white gold plus gold bracelet. Also, a belt, a musical photo frame, also a basket of flowers and ferraro rocher! And also, lots of cards drawn by my cute cousins.
whahaha.. me no need buy accessories le.. hehehehe... So happy!

But my cousins were running around, creating "havoc" in the house.. haha.. I got a big shock when I found my about-3-years-old cousin so innocently pulling the strings of my guitar (MY BABY WORZ...) .... WAH.. Immediately went to stop him..

Well, actually I was wondering how cg would celebrate it for me. At first thought they will celebrate for me on fri mahz..

On sat nite after the birthday buffet, as I stepped into the living room, I felt so weird, cos it was so quiet and the lights was dimmed... Suddenly the cg just popped out fm my right from my brother's room... Then suddenly Gerald popped out from the left, giving me a fright also... haahahaha...
So funny... was so shocked to see all of them and singing birthday song.... waaaahhh... so touched!

Well, there came the game part.... cg said it was easy but apparently wasn't so lo... at first everyone looked at me do it, but in the end, everyone had to help me with it, muttering the difficulty of the game at the same time! really laugh till I wan to cry le... waahahaha... me hang up the "game" in my room le.... hehe...

As we were eating dinner together, I had so much fun laughing and yakking... hehehehe....

Ok, now, to elaborate on the present I received, my cg gave me a Crumpler sling bag! Actually din really know this brand but heard tat it's real ex! I was like... wah... And I really like it so much cos I wanted to buy something like that ages ago but din buy cos it's either too ex or I din fancy it. And I really like this bag so so so so much! And the card that Bev made is so beautiful! so sweet of my cg!

God is so good worz! Then somemore, these few weeks, I was seriously craving for rocher... it's my favourite type of chocolate but I hardly buy it cos it's more expensive! Then on fri, mag passed me a present. As I peeped inside, it was rocher! Immediately my heart was filled with joy! Rocher! wahahaha... God is so good! On sat, as the basket of flowers arrived from my uncle, it arrived with..... Rocher! My sister said God really knows what I want... whahahahaha... Yes.... Thank You God!

And another birthday present that God gave me? The dance practice yest. hehe..

Yest, Bro Ryan started plotting our positions le. Last week he gave us a major lecture and this week, though he did scold us again, it was lesser in intensity.
Alot of funny things happened during practice too and thinking back, it is still as hilarious!!!! wahahahaha.... *LOLz...

Anyway, actually I wasn't too happy with my position initially.. But I know that the Lord has a purpose in everything and He has put wisdom and creativity in Bro Ryan to choreograph the whole dance production.
So, I let go of my pride and I enjoyed myself in this position tremendously. hahaha...

Towards the end of the practice, there was a significant improvement in our performance and I enjoyed myself so much!

God really gave me a very good present by ending my 21st birth day with such a good dance practice yest.

Btw, My brother bought me a MP3 player! Zen Neeon!!!! wooohooo..

SO blessed, I can't contain it,
SO blessed, I gotta give it away
Your love taught me to live now
You are, more than enough for me.

My birthday wish?
Be more and more Christ-like, Seeking His Kingdom 1st.

I can't share my 2nd birthday wish... wahahaha... But God knows, I know, my sister knows. hahaha... =)

I love God so much! He truely knows the desires of our heart, and even before we pray, He knows wat we are going to ask of Him. So safe and protected in His embrace.

There is none who is like God. The Lord, my creator.

Psalms 149:3

2005-11-29T10:32:00.000+08:00

Saw 牛奶 on sunday nite at church cafe... thought my eyes were playin tricks on me...
but later when pastor Tan stepped into the dance studio and asked us to continue to practice, 牛奶 came in with a camera man..
I was like.... ehhhhh..... can i go n get his signature? hahaha.. no la, just kidding... he stayed for a few mins and left.....
not sure y he was there but read from the news previously tat he left Energy and is going to go into dance, choreography etc...
so yaz...

Learnt alot from Bro Ryan with regards to dancing. Alot of my perceptions changed.

- Open mindedness: Acceptance of any kind of dance ranging from Jazz to Ballet to Hip Hop

- Boldness: To dance out the steps

- Confidence: In own body language, posture and expression

- Humility: To learn from mistakes and correct it

- Expression: Express the feel of the music

- Focus: Remember the steps and get it right (Discipline of body)

- Practice: Practice, practice and practice.

Ultimately, Attitude counts very much in Dancing!

Dancing....... To please God, to praise Him.
~Ps 149:3 Let them praise His name with the dance; Let them sing praises to Him with the timbrel and harp.~
- Bro Ryan

My Word in Season:
When God called u to do something or to a place, He will Provide, For He is Jehovah Jireh, God my Provider.
Surely I can trust in Him to Provide!

"When I pray, you answer me, You encourage me by giving me the strength I need."
- Ps 138:3

New Specs

2005-11-22T10:06:00.000+08:00

This is my first time....
First time...... wearing my new plastic specs!!! hahaha...

Really felt like I made a bad choice... y?
Cos after I collected my new specs yesterday, the moment my sis reached home and saw me wearing it, she went," Ohhhhhh......".......
I was like," Ohhh nooo..."......

Just reached the office, and my colleague went past me, saw me, and I was like," Please dun ask me anything...."... hahaha...
She laughed and said," It seems like we are back in POly times.... Nevermind.. u still have another pair right?".
My heart sank immediately....

Ok, for those of u who are wondering y I made new specs, I decided to make a new pair after I dropped my old pair for the 101th time (Ok, exaggerated... maybe only about 50 times... including last time where a basketball knocked my specs off... and my dad sat on my glasses... hahaha...)...
And also when my brother wrestled with me and knocked my specs off...., I decided to make a new pair before my old pair "commit suicide" or was destroyed by my brother's deadly hand.......

Well, went to the shop wit my mom... when I tried my current pair on, being the sweet mother she is, she saw tat I kinda like this spec, she just said it looks pretty ok on me.. well, everythin was a blur to me when I tried the new pair cos I wasn't wearing contacts or my current specs.. so couldn't really see the effects of the new specs... So i was like, since the optician (he looks rather honest..) and my mom said it was fine.. then just take it lo....

so, ya, the rest of the story is known..

Well, this morning woke up with a swollen and bloated face. In case u are thinkin of a pig's head, no, my face is not swollen until so jia lat... haha... in fact, it's hardly visible.. just tat I could feel the swelling.. asking my mom, she said, issit cos u drank alot of water before u went to bed? I was like.... oh ya..
So before u go to bed, dun drink too much water... mornin wake up can cause swell in face, eye lids, mouth, watever laz....

Ok, one of the colleagues just came in and exclaimed," You look so nice!".... Another went," You look so different!"
so ya.. all sorts of different comments on my specs.. keke.... Anyway, one of my colleagues just distributed jelly to us... wah.. I got jelly to eat.. keke... (The jelly is in a wand shape... so cute! "Le-vi-o-sa!"..... Ok, dun think u caught the joke....)

Feel like sleeping now.. recently the weather is fantastic for sleeping.. cold and windy.. imagine hiding underneath the blanket, huggin my bolster, wah.... so comfortable... *yawnz.... strugglin to keep my eyes open...

2005-11-21T11:06:00.000+08:00

Number 8

2005-11-20T12:19:00.000+08:00

These few days, questions after questions surfaced in my mind, and life.
Questions, if not dealt with, will leave behind doubt and insecurity.

Yesterday nite, I spent time praying, and reading the bible. I was prompted to read through the ministry of Jesus, the things that He did, the things that He said.

When I came to this particular passage, the number eight just kept repeating itself in my mind. I can't shake it away, I can't forget it. I remembered that Pastor said, numbers have meanings. I decided to refer to a book that I bought some time ago, encouraged by Sis Cheng to buy. Boy, I'm so glad I bought that book, thinking back now.

By the way, the passage that I read was: John 20:26-31

"And after eight days His disciples were again inside, and Thomas with them. Jesus came, the doors being shut, and stood in the midst, and said, "Peace to you!" Then He said to Thomas, "Reach your finger here, and look at My hands; and reach your hand here, and put it into My side. Do not be unbelieving, but believing." And Thomas answered and said to Him, "My Lord and my God!" Jesus said to him, "Thomas, because you have seen Me, you have believed. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed." And truly Jesus did many other signs in the presence of His disciples, which are not written in this book; but these are written that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that believing you may have life in His name. "

[Italics and Bold mine]

As I've checked, quoting from the book:
The number eight speaks of security. Now the number eight is two times the number four. Two is the number of strengthening and four is the number of endurance, so the number eight is the strengthening of endurance. It gives us a picture of security or absolute stability. Our absolute security is in identifying with Christ in His death, burial and resurrection.

The moment I read this, I knew the Lord was speaking to me, into my life, giving me full assurance and absolute security. Knowing that this is a time, of Strengthening of Endurance.
The Word of God is like light unto my path, leading the way before me, guiding and giving me understanding.

I love God. He is the same, yesterday, today, and forever, always faithful.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To end off this blog in a lighter mode, alot of ppl I've asked does not seem to know what RSVP means.. Well, I sure din know wat it meant as well.

Thanks to my mom, who faithfully attended her English classes, taught me the meaning of RSVP. RSVP is a french word actually.

RSVP: Répondez, sil’ vous plait.
Meaning: Response, please.

Quite interesting, isn't it? So next time u know what RSVP means. =)

Birthday

2005-11-12T22:38:00.000+08:00

My Mummy wans to hold a buffet at home for my birthday.. invite all the relatives so that there can be a family gatherin as well..

So I'm like.. eh... Issit ur birthday party or my birthday party worz, mummy? Anyway, my mom originally said that she will just invite them on the main line that it is just a gathering.. only when they reach then tell them is my birthday as well.. Like tat they dun have to go to the expense of buyin me a present mahz...

I was like, "WAT???? MUMMY, IS MY BIRTHDAY WORZ... BIRTHDAY WITHOUT PRESENTS????" So my mom gave in to me and I told her, "Mummy, tell auntie they all, tat it's my 21ST BIRTHDAY OK? 21ST WORZ... remember to add this in, 21ST BIRTHDAY!"............. She was like, okok.... hahahaha...

My Mom then said, "can invite your friends also, then later can play play play for u...." wat she meant was, Pray Pray Pray for me laz............ hahahahaha... I was laughin like wat sia.... waahahahaha... (And no, her english is not tat bad.. she was just jokin..)

So this year my birthday celebration will be held at home with just a simple buffet spread for my family and relatives lo.. Mayb will just go for individual dinner with my friends loz... Spend quality time with them... Unless my house is big enough to host everyone, otherwise.....

But hor, my exam on 10th Dec... a lil sad cos can't even "enjoy properly"... so now muz study xtra hard so tat i can enjoy my birthday and not think about exams... wahahahaha...
I heard fm my lecturer, if we get 1st class hons, might be able to get a scholarship to study Masters or PHD in UK... I was like................Waaaahhhhhhhh....
If only I can get that scholarship..... But right now is the time to study hard so, yaz... Scholarship or no scholarship, muz get good grades....

My mummy said, after my exam, she will bring me to zoo to play... I am so happy....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Just now had dinner with my mom, bro n sis.
we ordered some korean stone rice, soup and noodles... haa.. the rice wasn't tat nice after a few spoonfuls but the ginseng chicken soup was pretty fabulous...

wat happened was, I was tryin to scoop the remaining of the soup to drink but u know la, when the soup left very little at the base, it's very hard to scoop it up unless u tilt the bowl.
So, I was tryin to tilt the bowl but unable to.. cos it was so heavy! Stone bowl, u know....?

So, my kor kor saw it and he slowly reached out his hands to test if the stone bowl was hot. After confirmin that it was not hot at all to hold it, he cautiously tried tilting the bowl for me.
Seeing that, my immediate reaction was to grab my spoon and frantically scoop up the soup and put it into my mouth as fast as I could. The stone bowl was really heavy and my kor kor let down the bowl for a while.
I looked at him with an I-still-want-to-drink-the-soup expression and he reached out to tilt the bowl again. Immediately I scooped up the soup. He said," Give u 5 seconds to finish it..."...
After tat 5 seconds, he began lettin down his hands. I hesitated.. whether to drink somemore or to stop... so I stopped tat split second when my kor kor start letting down the bowl, and just as he let the bowl down halfway, I began puttin my spoon in again to drink... My kor kor's reaction was so fast! At my action to scoop the soup again, he quickly tilted the bowl to the full angle again for my ease to scoop. It was pretty hilarious thinkin back..

After I finished drinking the soup, I felt so happy and satisfied and blessed.
My kor kor actually help me worz... there's undescripable happiness... I mean, my kor kor is a "zui ying xin ruan person".. hehe....... he cares, just tat he expresses it in a subtle way...

I love my kor kor and family...

In case u r wonderin wat's wrong with me, I love soup and I finish every drop of them as much as I can... keke... I'm the soup desperado in my family...

Today walked thru the streets of chinatown.. I was like... WOA!!!!!! so intrigued by wat I saw.. Food..... waaahhhhhhhh... so many types of food!!!!
Ok la, I pretty sua ku.. but I haven been to Chinatown for ages... so yaz loz....

Well, life's not all tat smooth... in fact, faced a couple of discouragements and even instilled fear in me.. But thank God for His Word, and the encouragements from my sis and mom.

For the Lord has not given me a spirit of fear, but a spirit of Power, love and of sound mind.
- 2 Tim 1:7

All things work together for the good of those who love the Lord, who are the called according to His purpose.
- Rom 8:28

For when I am weak, then I am strong.
- 2 Cor 12:10

"When I pray, You answer, You give me the strength I need."
- Ps 138:3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My sis just walked past me and the following conversation took place:

Sis: You writin ur blog?
Me: Ya.....
(Sis tried to take a peek)
Me: OIE!!!!! Look at it later la......
Sis: Ok, Dun write about the Maggie mee wor....
Me: WAAAHAHAHAHA.... THANK YOU... I WILL WRITE IT....

You know wat happened? Fri nite after service, my sis and I returned home with empty stomach..
So I went straight to cook maggie mee.. I turned to my sis with a do-u-need-my-help-to-cook-look... My sis replied," I know how to cook Maggie Mee..."
I said, fine... watever...

I din add any ingredients to my mee... but she added mushrooms, vegetables blah blah.. So after I cooked, she had her turn to cook, also for my mom's portion.
Into 15mins of my meal, my mom turned to me and asked," How come she is takin so long?"
It suddenly dawned upon me tat my sis has not yet finish cooking the maggie mee...
I burst into laughter and went to the kitchen to take a look... I stepped into the kitchen and asked my sis why she was takin so long... she said the water overflowed and she had to spend time takin out the water.. and she put soya sauce when she wanted to put light soya sauce... I burst into laughter again and as I enter my mom's room, I told my mom," You will enjoy ur food later......." (Note: With sacarcism in my voice.. haha...)....

Surprisingly, the maggie mee tat my sis cooked tasted quite good, quoted from my mom...
hahahaha.... so yaz....

2005-11-07T13:51:00.000+08:00

Hm.. I do have lotsa things to write.. but the words just choked.. and I couldn't dig them out for nuts.
It's like I couldn't find the flow and could not continue after writin 1 or 2 sentences...
So now, I'll try to dig out watever that I can think of and just blog it.. hope it helps to get my "blogging flow" back... haaa...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hm.. ok, have u heard of White tea? It's stated that it is more beneficial than Green Tea, containin antioxident and other substances which are better at preventing cancer sicknesses. (Yepz, it is on the higher end, costing more as well... so yaz..) Can go check it out loz..

Hm.. guess the in thing now is back to Victorian Lockets? I saw one in the magazine and I was like.. wah.... as advertised, it cost about 500 USD to own that Victorian Locket.. I'm like.. Forget it... I would rather spend it on food..... (But i've always like certain Victorian stuff and tat locket was beautiful!.. mayb I'll consider buyin it when Bill Gates adopt me as his god daughter....... ok, someone, bring me back to reality......)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

hm.... I wanna thank my sister.. for fetchin me home from school whenever she can.. Cos of her, I saved lots of time on travelling and managed to get more rest. You know what is a big person? Not as in physically, but as in morally and spiritually. One of the characteristic of a big person is helping others to grow.

Meaning, you are not selfish, you do not hold back at renderin ur help. But you share your experiences and provide assistance whenever able. (Of course in anything and everything, practise wisdom and discernment.)
My sis fufilled that towards me.

Thank u jie jie.

A note to think: Do you help and bless ppl and propell them forward, or do u keep all your experiences and resources to yourself?

~It is more bless to give than to receive.~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hm... On that sunday when I was in church, I saw alot of ppl....
*ok, duh, of course I saw alot of ppl.....

But the point being, I feel that they are very loving and serving, helping the old folks and JAMs students to get to service etc. (Yes, the ministry ppl)
I really feel so proud of them for their servanthood and love.

Feel so proud of our church. Really love this church and Pastor Kong and Sun.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I want to take a portfolio. - To retain my 21 years old look.. (Yes, will be going this year end or next year beg...)

I want to have a digital camera. - lil lat everywhere I go I can take pictures.. so fun.. (Anybody can gimme tat as my 21st birthday present?)

I want to backpack. - To Europe after my graduation.. (If I managed to save up...)

I want to be a billionaire... (I wish.......)

Reality check: None achieved.

hahahahaha... At least my sis already bought me "my baby" (the guitar) for my birthday and my mom gave me, a necklace... hehe...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now struggling to keep my eyes open.. suddenly got a sneezin fit.. keep wantin to sneeze and yet unable to, and it makes my eyes tired and watery...
*Yawnz...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I want to watch Harry Potter and the Globet of Fire!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I have to get back to work.

2005-11-04T16:53:00.000+08:00

keke... Just now went down to Spinelli with 1 of my colleagues and couldn't find anything I wanna eat.. so we went down to the foodcourt and I had bread with scrambled eggs and ham and tea.. yummy... hehe.. my growling stomach is now partially satisfied.. next on the agenda is to eat my biscuits.. yummy.. heee..

Yest nite I had a very bad nitemare.. It woke me up and left me staring into the darkness and silence of my room.
I was really terrified and I sat up on my bed and kept praying in tongues and meditating on the Word of God! I kept proclaiming the Name of Jesus Christ and His Protection over my life!
The fear really struck deep into my heart and I just couldn't get back to sleep and kept glancing around me nervously.. I was even very very tempted to awaken my sis to get her to pray with me..
But at last, I felt better and also my fatique overtook me and I fell asleep... (I'm telling u, I'm puttin all the blame on my dad and sis... It muz b wat they have discussed in the day that muz have caused me to have that stoopid nightmare... ahzzz.... )

It was a horrible dream and thinkin back, i still have the chills.
But thank God I have the Word of God to comfort my heart and to stand bold, confessing the Name of Jesus Christ upon my life.

"For the Lord has not given us a Spirit of fear, but a Spirit of Love, Power and of a Sound Mind."

I wan.....

2005-11-04T15:26:00.000+08:00

AHHHHHHZZzzzzz...

haaaa... no mood to work now... but ya laz... stil gotta push on... haaaaaaa.... Tick Tock Tick Tock, 2 hrs left to get off work..

Tonight have classes... I mean, I do like studyin.. but tonite got service.. ahz.. I miss church.. I wan to go to the House of God tonite..
*I'm wailing.... and whining and wailing.... and whining... I WAN TO GO, I WAN TO GO, I WAN TO GO.... okay, I'm acting like a brat now.. haaa...
hahaha.. okok, I'll just have to do wat I have to do.. go for sun service instead...

ahz.... for my previous co, I actually had lotsa chance to use Chinese, cos had to deal wit China plants.. Some of them said my chinese was not bad and even thought I was from China... (Hallo? haaa... but it was a compliment la...) think I watch too much "Gu zhuang xi" already.. haa...

last time a China friend thought my chinese was good.. but upon askin me a few questions and my understandin about chinese culture and blah blah, I blew my cover... haaa... My chinese turned out to be real bad actually.. haaaa..... but chinese is pretty fun, ya.. hahaaa..
I even thought of learning chinese calligraphy last time.. but... haaa.. no time and interest not tat strong... Now my chinese rusting liaoz..

I wan to go church and service tonite.
I wan my guitar.
I wan to sleep.
I wan to go home.
I wan my bolster. (Can I bring to office..? keke... =p)
I wan my mummy.
I wan to eat Mac Mac aka McDonalds

Later got class and I wun hv time to get a bite.. most prob wil sneak off to Spinelli later durin office hrs to get sandwiches or somethin...
I better end here or I'll start whining about wat I wan again... keke...
;p

History - Family

2005-10-30T00:49:00.000+08:00

Just heard from my mom some interesting facts about her father, whom was my late grandfather...
Dun ask me for the details cos I only roughly know the following.....

He was from China, and he fled to Indonesia... Why? Cos he was a triad member and was pursued by some other enemy traid members and forced to escape to Indonesia.. There he met my grandmother, yes, my late grandmother was indonesian chinese. My grandfather then became a sailor, THen the family came to singapore to avoid the 2nd world war.. when the war reached singapore, they hid in the forest. surviving on potatoes and some other food....

And guess what was the occupation of my grandfather's father? An opium trader/smuggler in China... Not gonna comment too much on that but... interesting, isn't it? How the history of the family is like...

hm... interesting......

Happy Birthday Bing Bing

2005-10-30T00:37:00.000+08:00

Dear Bing Bing,

Happy Birthday! 21 Years old le worz..... haaaa...

You look so pretty today! waaahahahaha...
Anyway, sorry that I had to rush off... Hope you like the braclet, and have a great time, ya!
Hugs... =)

I pray that the Lord will bless you and guide you in your future plans, that the potential in you will be released and you will fufill your destiny in God.
Love ya and keepin u in my prayers. =p

Ministering

2005-10-29T23:39:00.000+08:00

Today during cg, we had a time of exercising the Word of Knowledge and wisdom.

Not gonna go into details but just a brief recount.
During worship, I asked God why am I so busy, doing so many things... really so tired... plus some recent events did further discouraged me and caused me to think even more....

But, I felt comforted, knowing that as I trust God with my life, with all that I do, God will surely bring His Promise to pass.
Do not grow weary while doing good, do not lose heart, for in due season, we shall surely reap.
I felt the assurance and I know, I can trust God.

Lili further confirmed the Word and prayed for me.

What can I say?
The Lord knows and He sees.

I composed a song recently... The lyrics is not tat poetic or beautiful but it just simply reflects wat I felt.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jesus, You saved my life
All I am belong to You
All I need is You
I will worship You

To my Lord who knows it all
All my Praise belong
To my Lord who sees it all
I will worship You
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Help rendered in time.

2005-10-29T23:21:00.000+08:00

Went to Bing's birthday chalet today, was in a great rush actually.. and I went to the wrong place.. I was like oh no... how? was in a terrible dilemma and anxiousness cos to walk to that right place would take much more time which I could not afford or spare...

But since I was there, I just had to walk over, but I din know which route to take. Hence, I chose 2 person who past by to ask.

There goes our conversation:

Me: Hi, can I check wit u how do I get to downtown east from coasta sands?
the Couple: Oh, we are tryin to figure out the route as well...
Me: Great! can I follow u?
the Couple: Yeah, erm... are u going to A1129?
Me: ........................YES!!!!!! YANBING ISSIT?
the Couple: ya...................
Me: WAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA... let's figure out where to walk.........
the Couple: I drove................ I can give u a lift. =)
Me: Wahahahahaha..........THANK YOU SO SO SO MUCH!

Wat can I say? Though was a simple incident, God is simply so good to me! Of all the ppl, I met them who drove and offered a lift and going to the same place!
Hallo? Too much of a coincidence? I believe God is good.

"For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways," says the Lord.
"For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts."
- Isa 55:8-9

Wandering in the Wilderness

2005-10-26T13:16:00.000+08:00

Wandering in the Wilderness - October 26, 2005
By Diane Check

"Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know
that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and
character, hope." Romans 5:3

One morning I found myself in a fit of despair, feeling very lost, as if
I was going around and around in circles. There was a strong sense of
hopelessness in my heart and all I could do was cry out to the Lord,
"Where are you, God? What did I do to deserve this pain and agony? How
could this happen to me?"

As I dwelled in my own sorrowful thoughts, I was led to a place that
only God could take me to. It was as if He opened a portal from
thousands of years before, and I saw a place so barren and empty; a
wasteland. There, I imagined the millions of Israelites wandering in the
wilderness, searching fervently for the Promised Land. I thought about
how the entrance to the land they desperately were seeking was within a
few days' journey, yet they continued to go around and around in
circles. It was almost silly to think that they couldn't have just
stumbled onto the way out; after all, they were there for forty years!

But God's way is perfect and we are never to doubt that. Yes, God could
have opened up the pathway and led the multitude over to Jordan the
first week of their journey. Or He could have changed the fabric of the
wilderness to become green and lush, fulfilling their every physical
need. But He knew there was so much more for them, even if they could
not see it. I wondered what would happen if God made every pain go away
instantly or never had us wait upon Him for an answer to prayer. We'd
expect everything to be fixed immediately and there would be no
challenge, no perseverance, no repentance and no glory given to Him.
We'd just be sitting there waiting for the handout from our vending
machine god and would never know of His true goodness, grace and mercy.

God's purpose for our lives is so much more than anything we could
imagine. He sees clearly the whole picture, not just the fragments. He
knows the beginning, the middle and the end. God understands our pain
and asks us to endure it with Him. He is Jehovah Jireh, our Provider. If
He chooses not to fix it all at once, we are called to remain faithful,
abiding in Him, no matter what the circumstances. Even the Israelites,
who saw great pillars of cloud and fire daily, gathered baskets of manna
that fell from the sky, wore sandals that never fell apart and heard
clearly the voice of God, veered away and worshiped other idols and
man-made gods. Are we not the same as them?

Of course we want all of our sorrow, problems and pain to go away
instantly. But we need to be living as God commands and wait for the day
that He chooses to answer and act. As I thought upon this picture placed
before me, my troubles seemed less urgent and important. I knew that God
heard my cries and was there waiting for the perfect time to heal the
pain. And, as He did for the Israelites those many years ago, He will
answer my cry and lead me to a better place of His choosing, and in His
own time.

When I think about it, maybe a few more days of wandering in the
wilderness is not so bad after all.

New look...

2005-10-26T10:57:00.000+08:00

wahaha... wondering why the new look in my blog? haaa.. all thanks to sis kless lo.. her blog so nice! me also wanna change the look of my blog..
finally figured out how to do it le... *phew....
btw, I'm only testing this new look.. wil b changin to another one again... haaa... fun right? get a blog loz... ehehehe... *hint hint sis rachel... hahaha.... =p

Me been feelin kinda melancholic.. ahz.. wanna write a poem about it but I do not know how to express it like how my sis expresses...
she told me once that her poems have hidden meanings and expressions one... it was only after she explained to me that I understood the depth of those poems she composed...
I was like... hello? As much as I would love to write like her, haaa... it just simply isn't my forte... =p
SO yupz.....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And I will go, to your secret place,
bow my knees, to your glorious throne,
Have your way, in my heart, O'Lord,
Have your way.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I will bless the Lord at all times;
His praise shall continually be in my mouth.
My soul shall make its boast in the Lord;
The humble shall hear of it and be glad.
Oh, magnify the Lord with me,
And let us exalt His name together.
- Prov 11:2
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Acting?

2005-10-19T11:29:00.000+08:00

haaa... yest I saw the tv ad, showin ppl acting for the tv host competition or somethin lik tat? is Channel U one...

Me rem last time in poly, I joined this club, cos I wanted to dance Hip Hop mah.. If u r fm NYP, guess u should know StageArts la...
In the end, after I joined, they asked me to go for another audition. I was like audition??? I already had an audition for dance wat... y need to audition again?
They said it's for acting... I was like????????????
I realised cos it was a club FOR Acting, dancing, plus makeup.....
SO I HAVE TO BE ALL ROUNDED AS WELL.................................
I got the shock of my life. So, immediately tat day, I had to go for that acting audition! No time to even prepare...

So, I went... the scenario was something like I had to act like I was late and I gotta catch the train blah blah etc...
I acted the best that I could... with exagerated expression.. I was quite sure about tat...
I thought quite alot of ppl was tryin to hide their smirk when I was acting...

After the whole thing, I asked my friend how I fared....
SHe simply replied, " You mean you acted? I thought you were just being yourself........."
I was like.... "WATtttt??"......... hahahahaha... ok, fine, my acting is horrible...

I tried acting with my sis a few times... and those few times, we always burst out into laughter...
paiseh, me also dun have talent for acting.... waaaahahahahaha.... And I'm pretty sure, whoever tries to act with my sister, will have a hard time...... hard time tryin to contain their laughters!!!!! muaahahahaha...

Me better stick to dancing and guitar...
What is your talent and passion?

"But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint."
- Isa 40:31

2005-10-18T11:30:00.000+08:00

Wahahaha.. My dear Laiyin, finally u posted it up.. I was burstin to write it on my blog.. But thought better wait for u to write 1st...
haha.. yes, Gerald proposed to Laiyin le! yeah... me so touched till I nearly teared... to me, it's very romantic le....
Me so happy for the both of them!

WHen wil it be my turnz?? ahzzz... *hmmmm.....
wahahahaha... lemme find a bf 1st la.... *u know wat to pray for me le.. heee...

Anyway, yest nite I went for my usual Hip hop dance.. Originally I dun wanna go cos wanna go home study mah.. but the package I bought gonna expire soon so gotta go lo.. or else waste $$.

It was really fun.. hahaha.. as usual...

Bro Ryan is one person whom when u hear him laugh, or just look at his expression, u will feel like laughin as well.. haha.. he is so funni! [Like my sister.. look at her n u feel lik laughin.. whahahaha....]

me really enjoy his classes! *but when he fierce ahz... me scared worz... haaaa...

There was 1 part where he was markin the steps wit us. then when we reach floor movement (where we were facin the side, going to turn to the back and then infnt again), the gal infnt of him turned to ask him some stuff. He stopped. Then all of us turned back and looked at him. Like just freezin there.. waitin for him to continue. Think our expression quite funni cos immediately he burst into laughter, pointin n laughin at us... wahahaha.. me hear him laugh, me also burst into laughter... wahahahahahaha...

Then we suppose to act cool in the beg of the music.. but apparently, all of us look so weird and strange actin cool then we just anyhow pose there yoz yoz... whahahaha.. really laugh die me... me more of laughin instead of posin liaoz.. me act cool??? hm..... hahahahaha...

It was like a hip hop cum laughin session..

me ahz.. like laughin, like hearin ppl laugh.. hahaha...

Love suffers long and is kind;
Love does not envy;
Love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;
does not behave rudely, does not seek its own,
is not provoked, thinks no evil,
does not rejoice in iniquity,
but rejoices in the truth; bears all things,
believes all things, hopes all things,
endures all things.
Love never fails.

1 Cor 13:4-8

Wat is important?

2005-10-16T15:23:00.000+08:00

Me should be studyin now.. but somehow I seem to be able to study and concentrate better at nite.. Eversince I sat down from 2pm till now, determined to study, I have been distracted by a bbq twisties, then a cup of ice-cream, then another cheese twisties again... keke... Now, I'm distracted by this bloggy.. haha.. Lord, lead me away from temptations! hahaha...

I just passed by the kitchen and saw that my mom is cutting fruits.. ahz... I foresee I'll be distracted by the fruits again.. ahhhzzz...
Not tat I can't eat and study together.. but me not able to focus tat much when I am munchin.. unless is chocolates or sweets la.. hahaha...

Just as I am typing, my mom brought in the pear! Yummy.. keke....

**********************************************************************************
Something happened just now that led me to think, what is important to us?

I can list down quite alot of stuff...

But what really matters to you? Are you really cherishing it? Or are you just treating it as something natural and should just be there? Are you takin it for granted?

You know, there are so many things in life for us to get all worried and worked up at.
I was one worrying freak... hahahaha..
But now God's peace and love comforts me.

My sis just composed a poem.. Me feel like playin the guitar and singing songs to God now..

Here I am to worship, Here I am to bow down,
Here I am to say that You're my God
You're all together lovely, all together worthy,
All together wonderful to me.

Bad Day?

2005-10-13T23:00:00.000+08:00

Just yesterday, I had a terribly bad day.

First, I nearly tripped when I got off the bus. So ma lu... 1 guy behind me even went," OH!"....

Second, I spilled my bowl of soup all over the table during dinner time. And I had to spend time clearing up the mess....

Third, I was washing the dishes when the soap bubbles came charging at my eyes and face. I had no idea why it happened cos I wasn't exactly "violent" or "Chor lor" when I was doing the dishes...

Made me felt so horrid yesterday.. Felt like anything could go wrong. In fact, from the moment I got off the bus after I nearly tripped, I was imagining the worst that could happen..

hahahaha.. of course my day wasn't tat bad... It was just me not paying attention to the things that I was doing. Not focused enough.

Why? Thinking Back, I realised wat happened. WHen I got off the bus, I was deep in thoughts and din watch my steps. That was why I nearly tripped and fell...

When I spilled that bowl of soup, I was singing... and my hands followed my sound and spilled the soup.

WHen the soap came charging at my face, I was starin into blank space!!

Notice tat it was a case of unfocused thoughts.
SOmetimes, alot of things happened cos of our own doings.

Anyway, I finished my assignment!!! Finally.. Now I have to focus on my exam le....

Forgot wat I wanna write about le... hahaha.. but anyway, I love God!!! *Giggles....

Oh ya, my mom bought a super bright and glittering bag for my sis.. I was like.. ok, that bag is so auntie... hahaha.. but it turns out that it was quite fashionable and the more they see the more they like.. erm... I never liked glittering bags so ya, I'll give it a pass for the glittering bag... can u imagine me carrying a bright and glittering bag? *shudders.....
Give me a sling bag anytime!

My mom just showed me a hat that they bought for me when I was a kid.. haha.. that hat got the rabbit face infront and a tail behind it.. furry furry and colorful one.. hahahaha... I do think I remember wearing that cute hat when I was young... *Giggles.. hahahaha...

A Psalm of David. ~ Ps 23

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness For His name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil
For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil; My cup runs over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me All the days of my life;
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord Forever.

2005-10-11T22:13:00.000+08:00

Assignment

2005-10-11T20:47:00.000+08:00

Ahz.. These few days I have been tryin to rush my assignment out. It's supposed to be a 3000 word assignment and I barely reached a thousand and left with naught to write.

Sometimes I wish I can just give up. You know, just quit on everything. Quit on life, quit on work, quit on studies.
But do you know that, more courage is needed to continue the walk?
You might not know what you will face or how tough the road is ahead, but you know, you have God to rely on even when the going gets tough.

" If you faint in the days of adversity, your strength is weak."

But now I am strong because of God who is with me.
Though I may be faithless at times, But He is faithful always.

Because all things are possible through God and I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Alot of times, things or environment or even people gets to us or offend us because we allow them to.
Why dun we break free from such bondages and begin to love people unselfishly, forgiving all offenses? (Not meaning you be foolish but being wise in how to handle those relationships or situations at the same time.)
Hurts does not go away with time. Time merely buries it. We need to recognise it, accept what we are feelin and take corrective actions. Denial does not mean that the hurt is not there.

Hm.. I dunno why i am writing those but that is certainly not wat i planned to write.

I am listening to a pc of classical music which is so soothing and relaxing my mood.

Thank You Lord. For blessing me with the things I have right now.

Dear Wan Li, thank you for leavin your comment in my blog. I really felt so encouraged.
Previously, I went thru a period of not knowing wat to do as well. The best thing to do, is to pray and pray and seek the Lord. Though u might not get an answer now, But I believe God will reveal wat He wans to reveal to u in His time, the time tat He has planned.
For His thoughts and ways are higher than ours.

All I can conclude from here is that God is marvellous and He loves jigsaw. He always pieces up your life wonderfully. =D
DUn worry, but continue to trust in Him and love Him.

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God, and the peace of God which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and mind through Christ Jesus"
~ Phil 4:6-7

Amen.

Perseverance

2005-10-06T13:22:00.000+08:00

haha.. recently, I've wanted to write about 2 things in my blog:
1) do not compare with others about your achievements, measuring by the standard of men, but 2) each of us have our own purpose in God. How much we have achieved is measured by how much you have accomplished the purpose God has placed in your life.

This story depicted very well wat I wanted to write but did not because of the lack of inspirations and ideas to portray it.
Thank u sister for forwarding me this email!

**********************************************
"I Would not Quit" He Said

One day I decided to quit...
I quit my job, my relationship, my spirituality...
I wanted to quit my life.

I went to the woods to have one last talk with God.
"God", I said. "Can you give me one good reason not to quit?"
His answer surprised me...

"Look around", He said. "Do you see the fern and the bamboo?"
"Yes", I replied.
"When I planted the fern and the bamboo seeds, I took very good care of them.

I gave them light. I gave them water. The fern quickly grew from the earth.
Its brilliant green covered the floor. Yet nothing came from the bamboo seed.
But I did not quit on the bamboo.

In the second year the Fern grew more vibrant and plentiful. And again, nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo." He said.

"In the third year, there was still nothing from the bamboo seed. But I would not quit.
In the fourth year, again, there was nothing from the bamboo seed. I would not quit." He said.

"Then in the fifth year a tiny sprout emerged from the earth.
Compared to the fern it was seemingly small and insignificant...
But just 6 months later the bamboo rose to over 100 feet tall.
It had spent the five years growing roots.
Those roots made it strong and gave it what it needed to survive.
I would not give any of my creations a challenge it could not handle."

He said to me. "Did you know, my child, that all this time you have been struggling, you have actually been growing roots"
"I would not quit on the bamboo. I will never quit on you."
"Don't compare yourself to others." He said. "The bamboo had a different purpose than the fern. Yet, they both make the forest beautiful."

"Your time will come", God said to me. "You will rise high!"
"How high should I rise?" I asked.
"How high will the bamboo rise?" He asked in return.
"As high as it can?" I questioned.
"Yes." He said, "Give me glory by rising as high as you can."
I left the forest and bring back this story.
*****************************************************************

"Commit your way to the Lord, Trust also in Him, And He shall bring it to pass"
-Ps 37:5

God's plans are perfect

2005-10-04T09:47:00.000+08:00

My Sis forwarded this email to me. Very meaningful. Even when your dreams seem to die off, remember:

"...as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isa 55:9

God has His plans for you, but executed in His perfect timing. Read on and be encouraged.

******************************************************
Once there were 3 trees on a hill in the woods.

They were discussing their hopes and dreams when the first tree
said, "Someday I hope to be a treasure chest. I could be filled with gold, silver and precious gems. I could be decorated with intricate carving and everyone
would see the beauty."

Then the second tree said, "Someday I will be a mighty ship. I will
take kings and queens across the waters and sail to the corners of the world.
Everyone will feel safe in me because of the strength of my hull."

Finally the third tree said, "I want to grow to be the tallest
and straightest tree in the forest. People will see me on top of the hill and look up to my branches, and think of the heavens and God and how close to them I am reaching. I will be the greatest tree of all time and people will always remember me."

After a few years of praying that their dreams would come true, a
group of woodsmen came up on the trees. When one came to the first tree he
said, "This looks like a strong tree, I think I should be able to sell the
wood to a carpenter," and he began cutting it down. The tree was happy, because he knew that the carpenter would make him into a treasure chest.

At the second tree the woodsman said, "This looks like a strong tree, I should be able to sell it to the shipyard!" The second tree was happy because he knew he was on his way to becoming a mighty ship.
When the woodsmen came upon the third tree, the tree was frightened
because he knew that if they cut him down his dreams would not come true. One of the woodsmen said, "I don't need anything special from my tree, I'll take this one," and he cut it down.

When the first tree arrived at the carpenters, he was made into a feed box for animals. He was then placed in a barn and filled with hay. This
was not at all what he had prayed for.

The second tree was cut and made into a small fishing boat. His dreams of being a mighty ship and carrying kings had come to an end.

The third tree was cut into large pieces and left alone in the dark.
The years went by, and the trees forgot about their dreams.

Then one day, a man and woman came to the barn. She gave birth and they placed the baby in the hay in the feed box that was made from the first tree. The man wished that he could have made a crib for the baby, but this manger would have to do. The tree could feel the importance of this event and knew that it had held the greatest treasure of all time.

Years later, a group of men got in the fishing boat made from the second tree. One of them was tired and went to sleep. While they were out on the water, a great storm arose and the tree didn't think it was strong enough to keep the men safe. The men woke the sleeping man, and He stood and said "PEACE" and the storm stopped. At this time, the tree knew that while once he dreamed of carrying kings and queens, it now carried the King of Kings in its boat.

Finally, someone came and got the third tree. It was carried through the streets as the people mocked the man who was carrying it. When they
came to a stop, the man was nailed to the tree and raised in the air to die at the top of a hill. When Sunday came, the tree came to realize that it was strong enough to stand at the top of the hill and be as close to God as was possible, because Jesus had been crucified on it. When people looked at the crucifix, they remembered God.

The moral of this story is that when things don't seem to be going your way, always know that God has a plan for you.
If you place your trust in Him, He will give you great gifts. Each of the trees got what they wanted, just not in the way they had imagined.

We don't always know what God's plans are for us. We just know that His ways are not our ways, but His ways are always best. May your days be blessed and may God cradle you in the palm of His hand.

Best friends

2005-10-04T09:14:00.000+08:00

Me and sis and mom went to my bro's band performance, he was playin the flute.. haha.. felt so proud of him.

My brother ahz... haha.. i like to call him pinkie polka doggie [dun ask me y.. it just came across my mind.. haha...] and my sis like to call him pinkie dog [again, dun ask me y cos i have no idea..]..... we just thought it sound funny.. hahaha..

Pinkie POlka Doggie, Pinkie Polka Doggie, Pinkie POlka doggie... *woof woof...
*duhh............. me super lame liaoz.. hahaha....

Me meeting faith for dinner!!! haha.. has been a long time since we sat down together and chat and eat.. Miss faith so much!!!
love love faith faith!!!! muackzzz... hahahaha...

*You are my shield, my strength, my potion, deliverer, my shelter, strong tower, my very present help, in times of need!
[this is God, faith, and my song!!!!!! hahahahaha.... ]

somehow I feel like bing bing and hui hui will "attack" me for seldom meeting up with them as well.. ahz...
Bing ahz.. I will b going ur 21st birthday party la... u wan sakae sushi? hahahahaahahaha.... lolzzz...

2005-09-28T16:41:00.000+08:00

The Most Important Quality in a Life Partner

2005-09-28T14:08:00.000+08:00

Thank you sis, for forwarding me this piece.

********************************************

The Most Important Quality in a Life Partner
by Eugene Loh

If I were to ask you "What's the most important quality that you seek in
a life partner?", what would come to your mind?

If recent surveys are anything to go by, women generally value a sense
of humour, a caring nature, and sensitivity to her feelings and needs.

For men, what comes up tops usually is a gentle nature, good looks, and
yes, a sense of humour.

Studies have shown that for men though, they perceive "a sense of humour" not as having the ability to make them laugh, but being able to understand and be amused by their jokes. A fundamental difference in the sexes there? Perhaps, but that's a topic for another discussion.

So, back to the most important quality you seek in a life partner. What
have you come up with? If you're like most of us, you would either think
of a external quality like a smooth complexion or a personality trait,
like kindness or being good with children.

But how about "happy and fulfilled with an exciting life"?

Looks will fade, and a person with a great sense of humour may not
necessarily have the strength of character to endure life's challenges.
So think about it - wouldn't you rather spend the rest of your life with
someone who is independent, happy and with an outlook on life that is
enriching, stimulating, and vibrant?

I don't know about you, but I know quite a number of people whom you
would not give a second glance at on the street, but the moment they
enter a room, they draw the attention of everyone with their lively
stride, beaming faces and exuberant talk.

That's the most important quality I'd seek in a life partner. Someone
who is full of life and energy, a shining beacon through life's dark
moments, who can still make me laugh when the terrain gets bumpy.
Someone who is enterprising, innovative and always surprising.
Someone I can know and love for years and still fall for every day.

An aspect that we often overlook in our search for a mate is his or her
attitude towards life. His or her values and convictions. Can they
withstand the test of time? The trials of living together? Is it time you re-examined your criteria for a life partner?

What about your family?

2005-09-28T11:13:00.000+08:00

Thank you Bev, for emailin me this story.

************************************

F A M I L Y

I ran into a stranger as he passed by,
"Oh excuse me please" was my reply.

He said, "Please excuse me too;
I wasn't watching for you."

We were very polite, this stranger and I.
We went on our way and we said good-bye.

But at home a different story is told,
How we treat our loved ones, young and old.

Later that day, cooking the evening meal,
My son stood beside me very still.

When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
"Move out of the way," I said with a frown.

He walked away, his little heart broken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.

While I lay awake in bed,
God's still small voice came to me and said,

"While dealing with a stranger,
common courtesy you use,
but the family you love, you seem to abuse.

Go and look on the kitchen floor,
You'll find some flowers there by the door.

Those are the flowers he brought for you.
He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue.

He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,
you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes."

By this time, I felt very small,
And now my tears began to fall.

I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
"Wake up, little one, wake up," I said.

"Are these the flowers you picked for me?"
He smiled, "I found 'em, out by the tree.

I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.
I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue."

I said, "Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;
I shouldn't have yelled at you that way."
He said, "Oh, Mom, that's okay.
I love you anyway."

I said, "Son, I love you too,
and I do like the flowers, especially the blue."

FAMILY
Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company
that we are working for could easily replace us in
a matter of days.
But the family we left behind will feel the loss
for the rest of their lives.

And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more
into work than into our own family,
an unwise investment indeed,
don't you think?
So what is behind the story?

Do you know what the word FAMILY means?
FAMILY = (F)ATHER (A)ND (M)OTHER (I) (L)OVE (Y)OU

Discussion/Debate

2005-09-28T11:10:00.000+08:00

God is good and every move of His is for a purpose.

Today, for the 1st time in dunno how many weeks and months, my dad and I had a discussion about…. Why God allow evil to exist.
Look at my previous post. It was an article by Pastor Sy Roger on why God allow evil to exist.
The reason why I went to Pastor Sy’s website was cos I wanted to find some materials about a particular subject. And even as I browsed, I couldn’t find wat I was lookin for. Then my search came to this article “Why God allow evil to exist” and I decided to post this on my blog. After I posted it, I was thinking to myself, God, there must be a purpose to this, why did you let me see this article which caused me to decide to post it?

Indeed, God always have a plan. Like I said, for the 1st time in dunno how many weeks and months, my dad and I discussed about this. My dad asked this morning,” If your God is so good, why He allow so many suffering?....”

In my mind, I knew exactly what to reply him. And I was thrilled because I knew the article was for that purpose, to reply my dad. Previously, I should think, a few months back, my dad asked me this question a couple of times, which I failed to reply him satisfactorily or with conviction and reason.

This time, I remembered what the article said and I replied him with the summary of why God allow evil to exist.
1) Earth is under a curse because of the fall of Humanity, the results of the disobedience by Adam and Eve. That is why we experience death and the imbalances.
2) The satan is Prince of this world FOR THE TIME BEING. Jesus will come back one day and until that day, Jesus is life to only those who believe. God is a good God and Satan is a bad satan.
3) We all have the freedom of choice given by God. The consequences of our decisions not only affect ourselves, but also those who are around us.

This discussion/debate, 1 to me and nil to my dad… haha…

My dad didn’t know what else to reply but said, dun believe blindly la..
I told my dad simply, Christian faith is not blind faith. Because the heart cannot delight in what the mind objects.
Christian faith goes beyond logic and reason, not against it.

The ministry of Jesus is not a tale or a myth, but history which can be explained and life which is present now. There are many scientists, historians, apologists who came to Christ because of the overwhelming evidences that they have found.

My dad went,” Hmphh.. good that u went and check up the stuff.”.

Hahaha… God bless pastor sy and the apologist of the book I read…
=p

“Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kindhearted to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.”
-Eph 4:31-32

Why does God allow evil to exist?

2005-09-27T14:45:00.000+08:00

I came across Pastor Sy Roger's article when I was browsing his website..
Thought the below article is interesting and do answer our questions.. so ya..

Article copied from Pastor Sy Roger's website: http://www.syrogers.com/media/bigquestion.php

The Big Question:Why Does God Allow Evil to Exist?
by Sy Rogers

Warning: this reply contains my religious opinion - read no further if you don't wanna know!

All over the world people ponder this question. It's been called the 'Theologians Dilemma' that is, how can Christian people defend, let alone believe in and trust a God who allows such terrible evil and suffering on earth?

While touring around the world in 1998/99 as a singer with the euro rock band NoLongerMusic, this issue of God's character in a world of hardship was probably the number one challenge we had to address when interacting with patrons in the clubs and discos where we performed.Whether in clubs or churches, I've heard this issue raised over and over again by Christians & non Christians alike: "how could God be good when He allowed this tragedy to happen to my child?" or "how could God really be loving if He didn't intervene to prevent such a terrible accident? Or plane crash?, or earthquake?" or "Why would God allow Satan, or Hitler, for that matter?"

The list of questions like this is almost endless. People have an expectation of God that IF He's so good and loving and involved, THEN He shouldn't allow evil or bad things to happen.U ltimately the real issue being addressed isn't 'why does God allow evil'. Here's the real question: "Is God as good as He says He is?"

The evidence around us in a troubled world makes us wonder -- even the people of faith must wrestle through doubts and fears, which if we don't face up to them, can hinder our experience with God and life. After all, you don't build a relationship with someone you don't fully trust.

While I don't know all, and I'm not going to try to defend God whose ways are above and beyond my limited view & experience, I can offer at least 3 understandable reasons explaining WHY the Good Creator, Loving Father, Powerful Lord allows such awfulness on earth: … Earth is under a curse and separated from God.

Many people somehow seem to think that life is supposed to be wonderful and convenient -- especially first world developed countries where we are able to exert some control over our environment for our comfort and convenience. When suffering in it's various forms happens, people act as if this is something strange and undeserved. Frankly, God talks pretty straight to us in the Bible: Everything is cursed and out of balance:
Even the very planet -- so there are violent storms and earthquakes and floods and plagues and predators, all of which induce suffering.Humanity is cursed: We suffer Psychological imbalances such as fear, hatred, greed, lust -- all of which produce forms of suffering. Biology is cursed too: you will suffer the indignity of aging and then you die often not very nicely either, because we are fragile and subject to a host of terrifying diseases and system breakdownsthere will be suffering, and why would you think that you would be spared?
Add to this Satan is lord over earth for the time being.

The Biblical Worldview states quite factually that Evil exists and has it's origins in disobedience to God, demonstrated first by that fallen angel Lucifer, renamed Satan (Hebrew for 'the one who slanders & accuses'--who does Satan accuse? God & His character).

Christians sing in church that 'Jesus is Lord'---and yes, He is indeed, but not on earth yet! God is purposely unfolding His zillion year cosmic plan according to His timing and strategy therefore, the inferior but still destructive devil has his season of influence for a time.
Meanwhile, Jesus is only Lord on earth right now thru the lives of those choosing Him -- and even then for believers it's a battle over just who will be Lord in your life today! In our raping, warring, molesting, greedy world, it's pretty obvious just who owns the system for now and man, do we humans suffer as a result!
The New Testament writings give evidence that one day Jesus WILL come back and rule the earth as the rightful prince. But for now, even Jesus called the devil the Prince of this World. Why? Satan has temporarily seized Lordship over earth thanks to Adam and Eve's disloyalty to God -- thus forfeiting their 'right to rule' over the earth. So not only are we fallen creatures on a fallen, cursed world--we also suffer even more thanks to the evil influences of Satanic lordship.

But wait--there's more: Humans have the freedom of choice for good or bad.As if the first two reasons weren't enough, another major source of suffering inspite of God's goodness, is our own personal choices which affect us and others.

Choice is sacred territory -- and God will let you and I hurt ourselves and others based on our freedom to make our own choices. In fact, God will let us choose to go to Hell before He'll force us into Heaven.
My biological mom died in a car wreck due to drink driving. She was only 28. Not only did she end her own life due to her tragic choice to drive while intoxicated she also seriously injured someone else in another vehicle.

A sad illustration that God will allow us to make our choices, even though the outcome is so painful. God is willing to forgive, but the consequences are not so forgiving. It's no wonder that God asks us to choose to obey him--even if we don't want to.

Obeying God may not solve all our problems, but it doesn't create the kind of suffering that disobedient choices eventually will. At the end of the day, the real issue for those who follow Christ, is will we trust God even if we don't understand or appreciate the decisions He makes and the things He allows? Is He good only when things are going well for you, or is He good all the time, even if your blessings are stolen, or destroyed by some disaster?

That famous survivor of the Nazi concentration camps, Corrie Ten Boom once said that 'faith is simply trusting God's character, even when life gives you reasons not to'.

Considering that all of Corrie's Christian family perished in the concentration camps, she would have an understanding of suffering and the reality of evil. At times, Corrie & her sister Betsy, who died in the camps, were mocked for their faith by the other prisoners--who would say 'how can there be a God who allows such a nightmare!

Betsy replied: 'This camp is not God's doing. I don't know why He allows this place, but if you knew Him you would know that He is love.' She went on to say, 'Perhaps He brought us here to show you that there is no pit so deep, that He is not deeper still'.

In my opinion, our purpose on earth is not to have a happy life untouched by evil and the suffering it imposes. Our purpose is to know God and then, having experienced His love, to make Him known in loving service to others.

The reality of evil on earth can fill one with dread over the possibilities but if that dread drives you to God, and if from Him you obtain comfort and peacethen even evil has been exploited by God. Evil and the pain that it imposes matters very much to God, and He has sent a massive remedy in the form of Christ.

The creator Himself has been victimized by evil and He has shared our suffering -- He knows evil and it's price firsthand.
He sees, and He knows and He cares about your suffering. One day the issue of evil will be permanently and absolutely resolved. And we who have suffered because of it, will be compensated forever, if we are reconciled to God.

Until then, let us follow Him faithfully, not because we know or understand everything, but because we know Him and believe He is good!

Songs

2005-09-27T14:23:00.000+08:00

keke.. yest when I was in the toilet, suddenly got a tune.. the tune just came out from my mouth.. haha..

I immediately tried out and filled in the chords, and played for my sis, to see if she has heard anything like this before or if it's a-not-so-nice-tune....

My sis commented that the tune is nice and very childlike.. haha.. like those songs that we sing when we were young.. haha.. I had the same impression as well.. heee...
The song is not finished cos I have no idea how to go from there... But ya, I pray the Lord continue to give me ideas and inspirations. =D

Tonight I have classes... ahz.. really dun feel like going... but I have to go in order to get the answers and explanations to the questions.. so yaz......

me feel like sleeping.. esp after the delicious fish burger and milk tea I had from mos burger just now... ahz.... keke.... =p

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths."
- Prov 3:5-6

2005-09-26T09:52:00.000+08:00

Purple mug

2005-09-25T14:07:00.000+08:00

Me now studying, erm.. ok, bloggin..... haha.. can't resist bloggin abit b4 embarking on my studyin plans.. ahzz... haha.. but i'm happy cos I got my purple france disneyland mug and my Da Truth[rap cd] with me... hahaha...

The purple mug and the key chain I bought from France, has always symbolised something, the Promise of God, will come to pass. Delay is not denial. Tat God is not a Man that He should lie. [Cos of my france trip. =D ]

Now gonna blog something that I've always wanted to blog.. Guitar! hahaha...

I was given a 2nd try, to lead praise with Gerald in cg. To be honest, my guitar skill is really not very good. And I must admit, my talent is not really in there cos I took a long time to understand the strumming, or even a longer time to practice pressing the chords.

I had been emailing Jireh on and off (depending on how fast he replies) and on 1 occassion, I told him tat I b attempting my 1st Praise in cg. Jireh immediately replied and asked me for the details and began to give me advise. He totally understand wat I was feelin cos at that time, it was his 1st time going to song lead in a korean church in the States as well. [yep, he has been song leading but this time, he was going to step out of his comfort zone, into something bigger]

Tat is why I never believe in chances. WHy is it that at the point of time just b4 the event, Jireh replied and was able to advise me cos he was going thru something similiar? Because God has His wonderful plans, that is not by chance but wonderfully planned and pieced together.

SO, Jireh told me a couple of things, that really changed my mindset and perspective about song leading.

In fact, before my 1st attempt, I was really nervous, cos i knew I was not good enough, or at least, far from the standard, and definitely not prepared.
I knew then, that the annointing was important. And I was worried that I could not bring in the presence of the Lord. So u can imagine my anxiety then.

So, Jireh told me, when I praise and worship God, it is by His grace that I am able to. And as I play in the cg, let the Lord guide my fingers and the Holy Spirit create the spiritual atmosphere.. How true it is!

Tat day came and the moment we stepped into worship [after my playing], I felt the mercy and grace of God overwhelming me. I began to cry out, Lord Lord, Your mercy be on me! Your Grace is sufficient for me! Like wat Bro Isa said yest, do not take for granted, the presence of the Lord. DO not take for granted, the grace and mercy of the Lord.

Though I played a few wrong chords, I know, this is just the beginning. I will not give up. In fact the more I play, the more passionate I am about the dream of becoming a cg guitarist.
How awesome it is to Praise and worship God!

COming to this, Bro Isa shared about his dream and the change in plans that God has revealed to him.

I was strucked by his sharing. Suddenly, I felt my dream and visions are so small, it's only about I, me and myself. Yes, of course, the purpose of my dreams is to glorify God and His kingdom. But notice the pattern, I wan to be, I wan to do, I wan to say, I wan to go, I wan.... I wan.. I wan... I am going.... I......... I..... I....

I really pray the Lord reveal to me wat He wans me to do, and not just myself thinking wat I can do for Him. And I pray when the moment comes, I will activate the faith that the Lord has already deposited in me, to obey and to step out.

I thought I saw a vision, the sweet aroma of the Holy Spirit dwelling in the cg, then resting upon Bro Isa, during worship, and the assuarance that the Holy Spirit is annointing the mouth of Bro Isa.

I pray and desire the gifts of the Holy SPirit. But the pre-requisite? To make room for the Holy SPirit, preparing an upper room for Him to dwell together with me.

Quote:
The people in the world dun do it cos they fear circumstances
We are staying pure because we love God.

Chocobits

2005-09-23T13:33:00.000+08:00

haha... me so happy today.. hahaaa...

Actually, today I forgot to bring my sweater to office, so I was like, oh no.. me gonna freeze liao... *brrr... brrr....
But I thought of a way to keep myself warm, go to the big cupboard and file some stuff.. ahahaha.. after some manual work (filing and looking for files), me feel so warm le.. hehehe..

After that, my sis and mummy came to look me up for lunch and brought me my sweater.. ya la, sis took leave today.. so she going pasir ris cycling with mummy later.. ahz... me so sad.. me wan to go also.. but cannot la.... haha... but me so happy cos mummy n jie jie took me to Rocky Master to eat and now I'm drinking Chocobits... yummy.. hahahaha... me so hhaaapppyyyy.. kekeke...

Then now me blogging and trying to post Coco's Mtv in my blog... wahahaha... And later going to service.. whaahahaha... and my mummy most prob be coming service later alsoo.... wahahahahahaha....
Previously, I was browsing Pastor Benny Hinn's website and requested for a sort of poster size picture with bible verse. And I received it today! Airmail! hahaha...

Wat a day!

***********************
Lord, You know.

The Joy that I have,
Lord, You know.
The tears that I shed
Lord, You know.
And these, Lord, I know,
Because You are with me.
*************************

Input --> Significantly huge, Output --> None

2005-09-23T11:25:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was my 2nd tutorial and I was completely stumped and overwhelmed.

My tutor got us to try 1 of the exam questions, allowing references to be made to the lecture notes. I thought it was easy cos afterall, I did understand most of the concepts and so long as I got the formulas, it could be an easy task.

Utterly wrong was my thinking.

When I attempted the question with sub questions, my mind went blank, and suddenly, it seems like I understood nothing. For something as simple as applying numbers to the formula, I did not manage to get it. haha.. "So fun"...

I mean, sure, lots of my classmates apparently did not get it as well.

But I was aghast at the fact that it was not as simple as I thought. I thought I knew it, but in fact I did not. So for the rest of the class, I dropped my "I-thought-I-know-these" attitude and began to learn all over again humbly. Boy, I gotta practice more questions..

I guess sometimes life is like that. You thought u had it all under control, u thought u know it all.. but when God throws something at your face, u realise how completely no clue u have and how much u need Him.

Take it from someone who knows. CHeerios! =)

"Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others."
- Phil 2:3-4

2005-09-20T13:35:00.000+08:00

************************
For my Lord Jesus.

I say, life is a bed of roses,
This God did not promise.
Trials and Tribulations we will see,
and to endure to the end.
For the promise, hope and crown,
we run like we never did before.
Alas! Some people ran like just the wind,
all is vanity under the sun.

I know I am weak.
But in Him, I am strong.
Life to me is Him alone
With Him, I can go on.
************************

My colleague went on a few days mc. She had been on Mc like so many days although she only started work for like 2 months?
I'm not upset with her weak health or need for rest and to adapt. I'm just frustrated at the sudden work load that has been passed on to me since I'm her backup.

Gonna stop here before my work pile up like wat...

Ahhz... feel even more frustrated after a call from someone.

"Cast your burden on the Lord, And He shall sustain you;
He shall never permit the righteous to be moved." - Ps 56:22

All things work together for the good of those who love God, those who are the called according to His purpose.

Cake is yummy and pretty. But before u get a cake, u have to get the sub ingredients like eggs, flour, sugar, etc etc. Raw and alone, the ingredients are horrendous to taste. But when u mix them and go thru the heat, u get the end product, which is the cake, pretty and delicious.

So ya, horrible events that happen to us, we feel bad. But when we combine them and become experiences for us, it becomes our steppin stone and added knowledge of life.

So, God never lets our experience goes to waste. Endure and persever!

WenXiang's Birthday

2005-09-19T16:45:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO WENXIANG!!!!! WOOOOO..... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!

GOD IS BLESSING YOU NOW, GOD IS BLESSING YOU NOW, GOD IS BLESSING YOU, WENXIANG!!!! WOOOOOO.... GOD IS BLESSING YOU NOW!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...... *CLAP CLAP

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, WENXIANG!

Promise from God

2005-09-19T16:39:00.000+08:00

My tagboard seems to be down.. ahhhz...
*******************************************************

The Lord is good and ever lovingly encourages us.
Like a parent dotingly looking lovingly at their little toddler.
Step by step the toddler walk, the parent cheer on.

Dun worry, I'm not going to start my weird poems again.. haha..

God is good all the time and all the time, God is good..

Sunday service during worship, I just felt the Lord said gently,"I am your strength and I am with You......................." After awhile, I felt an impression, like the Lord is in His dwelling place, hearing our worship.

It's a wonderful feelin of assurance, love and comfort. Peace.

Pastor Richard Roberts asked what will we ask of God.
I immediately asked for alot of things. hahaha.. me greedy ah... haha..
But as the Lord wills, so I will receive.

Je ne suis pas perdu!

2005-09-19T15:44:00.000+08:00

haha.. Wondering wat's the title meaning? Get the translation online.. haha..
nei ne nei ne poo poo.. haha...
Ok, I wun get childish right from the start of this blog entry.. hehe..

My sister is very good in poems and sometimes I get inspired by her to write some poems as well. But the inspiration seems to stop halfway or turn out to be less beautiful than what I had expected. Guess my talent is hardly in composing poetries.

But as I was writing an email to Jireh, I thought of the below which really describes how I'm feelin. haha.. it's not tat beautiful, it's not that poetic but it's just like..... a fact for me. hehe..
[Someone called me and asked me, eh.. the poem for this guy ah? I'm like, hello? Jireh is my very dear god-brother... To explain more clearly, I was writin an email to him when I thought of a poem to write for God. So, the below poem is for my Lord who sees me through the journey of my life! Please dun get the wrong idea that the poem is for Jireh.. hahaha.... my gosh...]

************************

For my Lord Jesus!

I say, life is a bed of roses,
This God did not promise.
Trials and Tribulations we will see,
and to endure to the end.
For the promise, hope and crown,
we run like we never did before.
Alas! Some people ran like just the wind,
all is vanity under the sun.

I know I am weak.
But in Him, I am strong.
Life to me is Him alone
With Him, I can go on.

************************

I had to stop cos I couldn't think of anything more to write though there is much more I would like to express than these. But I know if I insist on continuing, the poem will just get worse. hahhh..

Anyway, if you ever heard of the korean drama "Da Chang Jin - Jewel in the Palace", pls dun watch it. Or you will be seriously addicted to it.
hahaha.. It's like Harry Potter. You get so into it. of course there's no similarity in the story la.. But the food, the culture and the story plot just sucks u in and u sorta keep wanting to find out wat's gonna happen next..
So ya.. a word of caution, watch it and u'll find it hard to stop. hahaha..

***************************************************
God's hands, though invisible,
are holding you on one side and the other.
It is there holding you tightly
BECAUSE He never wants to loose you.
When you feel rocked by the earthquake called life
and feel down and broken - realize that His love surrounds you completely
knocking to be let back into your heart
that He may bring you back to Him
where peace flows like a river onto you.

- A Message from a dear friend
**************************************************

2005-09-18T21:18:00.000+08:00

"I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me."

John 14:6

"Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it."
Matthew 7:13

Stomach - Queasy feeling.. BTW, I M NOT COMPLAINING.

2005-09-15T17:05:00.000+08:00

ahhzz... my stomach not feelin good.. havin those queasy feelin...
muz b cos of my schedule la.. then never eat proper meals.. haha..

cos everyday [for this wk] i have to rush [as in, really rushing! Running to catch the train, running to catch the bus, running to catch the class.. running to get home before midnight.. Haiz.. haha...].. I think on average, i had bread for breakfast and dinner, then a proper lunch.. aiyah.. i got no bread tonight.. have to survive on biscuits le.. hahahahahaha...
*phew.. haha...

I know compared to others who really have hectic schedules, mine is like chicken feet already.. haha...

My colleagues said to me... wah, u so good n strong wor.. can tahan..
Inside my head, i was like.. wah.. I nearly going to cry already..
haha.. no la.. not cry la.. I am still going on fine.. *seriously!
but sometimes, when u feel tired, u just can't help thinkin how much longer u can take it.. haha..

yesterday, one of the guys in my class fell asleep and snored.. I looked around and saw a few gals giggling.. To be honest, I was really sympathetic towards that guy.. u really can see how tired he is and trying to pull this thru.

Then yest after class, I saw a group of dancers on the stage in atrium practicing. I actually know 1 of them.. haha.. met her in the dance classes last time conducted by church.
So I went to chat with her for a while.. and apparently, i CAN'T JOIN the dance group cos the timings clashed with my work... AHHZzz..

Sometimes I feel like, I am missing out on so much stuff...
WHy am I rushing all over the place, why am I working so hard? haha...

In case u r wondering, I AM NOT COMPLAINING... In fact, I am thankful to God, for giving me a chance to study, for giving me a good job to earn money, for giving me a family and spiritual family whom cares for me, for giving me talents, that I can shine for Him.

Hehe.. And I seriously have to start planning how to manage my time more effectively and efficiently..

"Whom have I in Heaven but You? And there is none that I desire besides You. My flesh and my heart fail; But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." - Ps 73:25-26

"The Lord looks down from heaven upon the children of men, To see if there are any who understand, who seek God." - Ps 14:2

Yesterday

2005-09-13T11:17:00.000+08:00

*Yawn... my eyes are tryin to force themselves wide open..

It’s only the 1st nite and I’m so feelin tired.. ahzz…

But me actually very blessed le. Yesterday, my sis actually came especially to drive me home from school. And she brought a surprise for me… My mummy!! Hahaha.. me so happy to see moi mummy.. haha..

After that, my dearie sister brought me to buy Mcdonalds fries and I shared it with my dearie mummy.. hehe..

Before that, at the expressway, my sis was so funny.. Hilarious…
We saw police motorbikes passing us at the 1st lane of the expressway. And we were thinking, might be some big shot coming la… that’s y got so many motorbikes..
My sis, trying to be funny and smart, changed lane all the way to the 1st lane, driving after the police motorbikes and said smugly to us, I am the big shot! Haha..

Me and my mom was like.. ya ya.. whatever..

Then my sister suddenly exclaimed loudly in dismay,” Aiyah!! I should have exit on the left just now..”…

We all burst out laughing.. see la.. tryin to be some big shot and then overshot the exit.. nei nee nei nee poo poo.. muahahaha.
But God is good la.. though we overshot, we found a faster way to get home.. haha.. so for every stumbling stone, God can turn it into a stepping stone.

And all thanks to my mom and sis, I got back home early (around 11.15pm.. If I go home myself, will be midnight already…) and having been satisfied by the fries in my stomach, I went to sleep yesterday soundly and happily.

Everyday, my mom faithfully cut fruits for me and my sis to bring to work to eat. When I called her this morning, I told her,” Mummy, the pear very nice!!!”.. My mom paused and said,” Eh, I cut apple lei…”…
I was like… issit? Apple ah.. oh no… wat happen to my taste bud..? hahaha..
Muz b the apple so juicy tat I thought I was eating pear.. haha…

Yest nite, the lecture was quite ok.. but sometimes, the lecturer just lost me completely. I was fighting so hard to pay attention.. But his voice just seems to drift off,” Logarithms can have the base of….. Permutation….. …..Standard deviation only with…”

Ya, me takin statistics for management as 1st module.. moi statistics in poly not bad la.. but hor.. now come this class, this module like so difficult..

God, give me wisdom and understanding!

So many chim words and this lecturer like “qing ting dian shui”. Dragonfly touch water [direct translation]. Meaning, he just touch and go without explaining in detail.. ahhzz…

But he is quite a good lecturer la, with rich experience.. so me gonna absorb as much as I can la..

Me go class tonight again.. But going home myself la..

God, gimme strength…

Tomorrow

2005-09-11T16:34:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow will be the 1st day I'll be embarking on my part time studies.

Mixed feelings. Happy tat I b studyin once more, dreadfulness cos I know I'll have to split myself up if I wanna do more stuff.

Noticed something new on this blog? Yeah, the song, My Memory, from Winter Sonata.
I cried pathetically when I watched the show.
[Hehe.. just removed it cos seems like something's wrong with the code.. anyway...]

Perhaps we should cherish and learn to be thankful and appreciate the things that we have, instead of always thinking and mopping around, thinking about the things tat we do not have.

I love God and regardless of how much the people around me call me fool, I know, I am wise in God's beautiful and faithful eyes.
Despite how the people around jeer at me and prevent me from serving and giving to the Lord, I will clung onto Him and lay up the invisible wealth of Tenacity.

I do not hate the people around me who does not share my love or faith in God and jeer and mock at me. I am trying to love them all the same despite what they have said or done. And my only gift to them is prayers.

I can give without loving. But I cannot love without giving.

To my Lord in Heaven, the 4 things tat I love to talk to You about always.

Please do not take Your Holy Spirit away from me. Do not cast me away from Your sight. Let Your Hand be with me always.

Lord, give me wisdom tat I be rich inwardly, that I be a woman of honor and discretion.

I pray as I walk thru the life You have given me, Lord, give me Your strength to go forth.

And Lord, forgive me, as I forgive others, and lead me not into temptation.

Let my mouth be filled with constant Praise and Worship to the Lord.
For You alone deserve all Glory.

Funny dance class =p

2005-09-08T10:21:00.000+08:00

On Monday, I went for my dance class as usual. And it was real funny, the teacher got us to imitate the mouth techniques as heard over the CD. After the imitation, then we’ll groove and get into the dance routine. I was laughin all the way and I seriously think I did a bad job.. I looked more like a crazy woman than a hip hop person. Haha.. But it was real funny and I had a great time laughin out loud. Laughter is a good medicine. Haha..

The news of the world

2005-09-08T10:20:00.000+08:00

Recently, when I reach the office, I would go to Channelnewsasia to see the news of the day.

For the previous few days, it was Typhoon Katrina's reports, then Indonesia plane crash, and today, Japanese encephalitis in India.

Makes me kinda wonder how much more bad news we can endure.

Yesterday, my Christian colleague and I had a chance, or rather a divine appointment to talk to another non-Christian colleague about Jesus.

To my surprise, this non-Christian colleague had been in a Missions school for a few years.
He knows who is Jesus and knows the teachings of the Bible. Yet, when we were discussing about after death, he declared that he is a non-Christian and believes in Albert Einstein’s Black Hole Theory.

Indeed, with knowledge does not necessary comes with understanding!

Throughout the conversation, this colleague knows that God has a predestined destiny for each of us, a season for everything, he knows that God created Heaven and Earth and do believe that there is one God [Which he said he didn’t bother finding out which God] who started it all.
But he added on to it by concluding that he does not think Science and God can co-exist.

[To be honest, I was praying like mad silently for wisdom and discernment.]

So after he said his piece, I just said simply that if you believe One God who started it all, which God is it? If you know that God is the One, then why aren’t u making the decision [to believe in Him]? Then I added on, God is beyond reason but not against reason. Science and God can co-exist. Take for example a testimony of this Scientist. I read an article about this Scientist [or/and also the apologist whom I read about whom had the similar accusations against Christianity], who did not believe that Christ is the Son of God. This Scientist went on to research to find evidences to refute the things that are written in the Bible. And the ending? This Scientist became a Christian. Because the evidences that he found was too overwhelming, which are all pointedly showing Jesus is Christ. [My colleague paused, listened and nodded. How much he absorbed or believe, I'm not sure.]

To make a note here: I read in the book some time ago, the author said, an intolerant and closed person is one who chose to disbelieve and not to make a choice in the face of overwhelming evidences.

After which, I had the chance to share my testimony with that colleague. It was quite a rushed one cos I wasn’t prepared [Please prepare ur testimony!!! U never know when is the divine appointment to share it!].
Though the brief session ended in a rush, I believe that there is a season for everything and I pray for the salvation of my colleagues.

Last but not least, an update about myself, I’m going on to the next phrase of my life, part time studies. Hehe.. it’s gonna be tough but I’ll persevere.

The Lord is my Strength and I can do all things through Christ whom strengthens me. Amen.

Hahaha...

2005-09-06T15:46:00.000+08:00

Today, I was working on my stuff, in my cubicle, when my colleague suddenly came over and sang to me," I've decided to follow Jesus, there is no turning back now".

I was so shocked.. and I didn't know this song, so all I did was giggle and smile at him.. hehe..

A few days ago, this colleague's dad passed away. I didn't know this colleague, in fact, I only saw him once. And since I wasn't sure if he's a christian or not, I decided to send him an e-card saying, God will wipe away your tears.
Later, I learnt from my another colleague that this guy is a christian and had plans before to enrol into Bible school and lead full time ministry. However, due to a twist of circumstances, he landed a job here.
I was like... woa... ok...

A few days later after I sent him the ecard, he emailed me back, saying thank you.... and even came to shake my hands... I was like.. eh.. okok... you are very the welcome.. haha..

So today, when he came over and sang this song to me, and quite loudly.. I was like... eh... I was quite dazed and blur.. So I just looked at him...
haha.. I just noticed something about the christians in this company.. They love to sing!!!??!! especially to me???!!!?? I would be doing my work and suddenly they come to my cubicle and look at me and sing.. and I would be like... eh..... eh.... eh... hehe.. haha.. ya..
It happened twice, once with my ex colleague, and now with this colleague.

Quite funny when I think about it.. haha.. *Giggles..
[But the lyrics that he sang is so true ," I've decided to follow Jesus, there is no turning back now"."]

Recently, my one colleague had a birthday party. The rest of the colleagues wanted to share the present but I didn't want. Firstly, cos the share was over my budget and secondly, I had in mind a gift that I feel is more personal and endearing.

This birthday gal colleague, is always talking about marrying the perfect guy.. Rich, handsome, and loving..
So I went to Attributes and bought this book for her," How to find the million dollar mate".

After which, I put the book in her company mailbox.. asking her to open her mailbox..
[I was feelin quite discouraged.. cos the birthday presents that she received were stuff like Mango, Guess.. And wat I give her? A book???!!!??? But you know what? The book contains the Word of God which should not be despised but treasured.]

After she opened her mailbox and unwrapped the present, she called me and said," I'm so touched!!!, I'm gonna read it tonight."
I didn't know what to say but I was thinking in my mind,"Wait till u read it...."
[Cos she's not a christian... and the book is not exactly teaching u how to get a rich mate.. but a spiritual mate... so ya...]

I prayed tat night.. Pray that she be receptive, that this book will bless her.

This morning, she didn't say anything about the book but just said that she's on page 70..
haha.. Not sure how she's takin in the content, but I pray, Holy Spirit convict her and let her be filled with understanding towards the word of God.

Being a CHristian is not like the Pharisees, parading around in the market place, showing off your bible knowledge, or praying loudly and "Professionally".

Being a christian is to be like Christ, blessing people with the love that Jesus has blessed us with. Blessing people with what God has blessed us with.
It's not being a weekend or sunday christian. It's putting Christ on every moment of your life.

To be honest, there are times when I'm a horrible twit.. And an Irritating sarcastic POrcupine.. haha..

Anyway, apart from setting a good example.. We have to be discerning and meet the needs of people. [Yes, we all know this principle...]
Jesus saw a broken boat, went into the world of the disciples, met their needs and brought them to His [Jesus] world.

There are times when I feel like I dun make a big difference in the world.. So what if I cared and meet the needs for this one? It's only 1.
But I remembered the story Bro Isa shared about the Boy saving the Starfish.

"I made the difference for this one, this one, this one, this one, this one......".

But also for this very reason, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge, to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness, to godliness brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness love.
~ 2Pet 1:5-7

My Sister - Haiz....

2005-09-04T00:31:00.000+08:00

My Sis saw my blog and was like," Can put more nicer things about me or not?" hahaha..

She just took my quiz and breezed thru it... I'm so amazed... Though she always talk talk talk.. SHe does listen and remembers wat I said.. haha...

She's now laying on my bed, waiting for me to finish this entry so that she can see what good things I write about her...

Ok, To be honest, My sister sings really well, ya.. and now my sis is going on and on about Les Miserables...

LOL... My sis is making me laugh like mad now... hahaha...
Yes, my sister is cute, adorable, "smarty-Sherri", wise and discerning... Pretty and talented..

Enough or not, jie jie??? Haaa.. I love you. =)

Quiz

2005-09-03T23:29:00.000+08:00

haha...

Got feedback that my quiz was quite difficult.. quite true la.. who would go and count the number of moles on my face or know that I nearly vomited eating Tomato [since I dun remember telling anyone except my family.. ] And surprisingly Bro Isa got it right! hahaha...
[Yes, Bro Isa, I know u guess one.. hahaha...]

ANd yes, if I can, I will get a horse as my pet and try water rafting...

WHy horse ah? Cos I did volunteery work previously at RDA [Riding for the Disabled Association]. I had some contact with horses and I simply fell in love with them.. haha.. Gimme a horse for my birthday!!! hahaha... Ya right............

Just wanna make a note, that sometimes unthankfulness can come out of our mouth when we are not careful and we dun appreciate the things that God has blessed us with.
So, be thankful and praise His Name always.

My sis is someone whom God has brought into my life to mould my character. Seriously, she can drive me crazy sometimes.. I would know neither to laugh or be angry with her antics..
She can talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk................
And I will hear and hear and hear and hear and hear and hear...........
ANd she will repeat and repeat and repeat and repeat.....
And I will listen and listen and listen..
Hahahaha... But undeniably, she can be very wise and sharp...

So, I'm,
Very thankful for my sister, whom brought me to church, gave me lots of advise [yes, alot..] and tries to be there for me.. very "blessed" to have her as my sis...
Very thankful for my family. Whom protected me from the harsh reality of the world and continues to shower me with love and protection.
Very thankful for Bro Isa, for being the shepherd of my life.. Ever so wise and understanding..
Very thankful for my previous cg mems [N139], who showered me with much love and guidance..
Very thankful for my present cg, whom weathered thru Tears and Joy together.

Very thankful to God, Jesus and Holy SPirit. You changed my life, and I will never be the same again. I love You.

Bloggin from work...

2005-09-01T17:13:00.000+08:00

Haa... I'm working now.. and bloggin at the same time.. Feelin a little bored now.. hee.. me listening to Cross CD. Awesome...

Recently, I faced so many temptations.. to spend money.. haha..
Just that where I'm working.. Sometimes I can spend alot on lunch.. esp when my colleagues head out for lunch..

Really gotta rein in my money [and yes, my unwanted desire for junk food] ahaha.. Keep me away from food!!!!
haha...

I gotta say NO cos I wanna stay focus..

Composed a song recently and put chords to it.. Not really complete but ya.. gonna do something about it.. I like sis Kless's song.. I thought it sounded really soothing and comforting..

A colleague just came over.. Hate it when people take advantage of u and r so insensitive...
Sounds familiar right?
Feel really frustrated when people are so "Bu zhi dong". They take your kindness for granted.

But ya.. SHE's NOT PERFECT... DEFINITELY... but so am I... tat's y we need Jesus to wash our heart ever clean..

Sometimes, I really dun wanna be so nice to ppl.. FOr wat? They dun deserve it at all... But ya.. I dun deserve Jesus as well.. But He died for me and ALL OF US.. HEAR THAT! I dun wanna demean the value of His Blood.. I wanna live for Him the best that I know how to.. There are sins leading to death... so Lead your life with all discretion, discipline, and guidance from the Holy SPirit.

Lastly, in everything that we do, let us glorify the Name of Jesus.

Huggies. =p [Gonna stay joyful for Jesus!]

God's healing!

2005-08-25T08:42:00.000+08:00

I was so excited that I had to blog this now. Now!

What happened was today, when I woke up, my eyes were hurting terribly. Like something got into your eyes and you just can't get it out.

My dad gave me a ride today to Paya Leba, then from there, I would have to take train all the way to expo. Anyway, the point being, when I was on my dad's car, I tried resting my eyes, massaging my eyes, rolling my eyes [yes, I seriously dun think rolling of eyes can be of any help] to see if the pain in my eye would cease.. but the pain just remained.. till I got seriously worried about it...

When I got on the train, I wanted to sms my friends to ask if they know how I can ease the pain cos I was getting increasingly worried and frantic. Yes, I know, I can be very paranoia.
[Just that recently, some stuff happened that caused me to be worried about my right eye.. but anyway, let me continue....]
But I didn't ask my friends cos I felt an assurance, that my eye will be ok. So I started praying.

As I was praying, I felt a gentle reminder saying," Lay your hands on your eyes". I was thinking, how to lay my hands on my eye, when I am on the train? I am so gonna look extremely weird..

So I didn't lay my hand on my eye and just continued praying.

I felt the gentle prompting staying there, "Lay your hand on your eye."

I thought to myself, ok ok, I will lay my hand on my eye.....
So I placed 2 fingers on my eye, pretending to rub them..
Right after I took my hands off my right eye, the pain disappeared!
It really disappeared!!! The pain just went, just like that.
I couldn't believe my eyes. Yes, I couldn't believe what my eyes were feeling.
The pain was gone! I was thanking God like crazy after He healed me.

Praise the Lord!!!!!!!!!
Indeed, the Lord is good!
Shout to the Lord, all ya People! Praise Him with all your Might!

I shared this testimony with my mom and haha... Who can deny the healing powers of our Mighty Lord?

Hehe.. I believe God has a great plan for my family!

Praise the Lord! And all Praise and Glory be to Him!!
Amen!!!!

Just for fun.. =)

2005-08-24T22:34:00.000+08:00

Haa.. When I was taking the quiz, I was like.. eh.. the questions quite funny right.. hehe...
Anyway, just for fun.. haa...

Take The quiz yourself

Will be updating my blog soon [I hope so..] haaa...

The heart of the matter

2005-07-30T23:02:00.000+08:00

Fri service, during worship, when we sang, "A heart after You", I felt the words," A heart that's ever true, one that's after You." remaining in my head even after worship.

Pastor Mike preached about the Lost son, who came back to the father, and the father welcomed him with open arms. However, the elder son was angry when the father rejoiced at the coming back of the lost son. Pastor said, the elder son did not know the heart of the father.

Do we know the heart of our Heavenly Father?

At least for me, I want a heart that's ever true to the Lord, one that's after Him.

Today during cg, I prayed to the Lord, that His Holy Spirit will reveal to me of the things in the Lord's heart, show me the things that is and that are to come.

Feel really tired now.. Falling sick... sore throat.. cos my colleague was practically coughing in front of me during work, and my sis was sick as well.. some of the germs must have rubbed itself on me..
I'm going to lay hands on myself and pray!!!!!!!!!!!!
Haaa....

I bought a book on apologetics last time.. It's definitely not a bedside story or a high-tea book where I can just flip and leisurely scan thru.

It has been ages since I touched that book [I've only read a few pages].. Today Bro Isa spoke about Spiritual Hunger.. haa.. I really felt so prompted to pick up tat book and study it afresh once again... haa.. Discipline!!!! so important... Time Management!!!!!! I really need to have better time management... SO many things to do and so little time.....

I've always wondered what is so special about Jabez. Now I know, his spiritual hunger for the Lord.

Jabez

Now Jabez was more honorable than his brothers, and his mother called his name Jabez, saying, "Because I bore him in pain."

And Jabez called on the God of Israel saying, "Oh, that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain!" So God granted him what he requested.

Breathe

2005-07-25T21:51:00.000+08:00

Actually I have lots to write. But somehow, when I want to put it into words, I can't form it.

I visited a friend's mom last saturday. Alot of emotions stirred up within me, as I saw her mom lying on the bed, unable to really communicate or even move freely.

Though I'm only seeing her for the first time, I feel so much for her.

I just realised something. This life is so short.

Once, when my colleagues were having lunch, they asked each other, "What is life?".
They spoke about Reincarnation, about Life after Death, about Retribution and Hell.

As I sat there listening to them, I drifted into my own thoughts......
What is life?

To me, life is a preparation for an eternal life with my Lord Jesus.
To me, this life is character moulding, learning to live a life patterned after Jesus.
To me, Life is having Jesus by my side.
To me, Life is Jesus.

I will not speculate with others as to where I will go after death.
Because I am sure of where I will Go when I die.
I will go to Heaven. Not Hell, not reincarnation, not the end.
But the beginning of an eternal life with my Lord Jesus.

As I looked at her mom lying there, I told the Lord, I'll die someday. But if I die, I want to be back in Your House, In Heaven.

Before I prayed for the mom, I asked her," Do you believe in Jesus?".
She could only mutter," Thank You."

I dunno what to say from here. Cos my heart is so heavy.

After the visitation, as I walked alone, I could only think of this song, Breathe.

Lord, You formed us by Your Words and Hands. You are closer to us than even the air that we breathe.
Lord, Breathe into our soul. Fill us with Yourself. That we may live a life more abundantly. A life filled with Your Mercy and Grace.

From Dust I come, To Dust I'll return, for all is Vanity under the Sun.
- Ecc3:20

To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven:

A time to be born, And a time to die;
A time to plant, And a time to pluck what is planted;
A time to kill, And a time to heal;
A time to break down, And a time to build up;
A time to weep, And a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, And a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, And a time to gather stones;
A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to gain, And a time to lose;
A time to keep, And a time to throw away;
A time to tear, And a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, And a time to speak;
A time to love, And a time to hate;
A time of war, And a time of peace.

He has made everything beautiful in its time.
Also He has put eternity in their hearts, except that no one can find out the work that God does from beginning to end.

I know that nothing is better for them than to rejoice, and to do good in their lives,
and also that every man should eat and drink and enjoy the good of all his labor--it is the gift of God.

I know that whatever God does, It shall be forever.
Nothing can be added to it, And nothing taken from it.
God does it, that men should fear before Him.
That which is has already been, And what is to be has already been;
And God requires an account of what is past.

- Ecc 3:1-15

Breathe

You are my God
Closer to me than the air that I breathe
All that I am form by Your words
I'm Made in Your Hands

Captivated by Your beauty
Falling deeper in You

Breathe into my soul
Spirit of God
Fill my life with Your Presence
Hide under Your Shadow
Dwell in Your Secret Place
It's You I long to know.

My CG.

2005-07-16T23:04:00.000+08:00

Really appreciate my cg very much.

I've been busy with work and I really feel very tired sometimes. Despite being a transition into a new job, I know it is not an excuse or reason to be slacken in my service towards the Lord, or compromising my walk with the Lord.

I really need the Lord to enlarge my capacity, strengthen my back to endure heavier responsibilities and workload.

Today during cg, the Lord filled me with His love, and He reminded me that even as I am busy with my work, I have to remember, SERVANTHOOD. It's not about me. It's not about doing things to please men or striving to prove myself.
It's about the Lord and building lives. It's about living everyday, as a living testimony to others for God, glorifying the Name of Jesus Christ.
The Lord reminded me, I have been so busy thinkin about my job, myself and,...... myself.

How selfish?

The Lord reminded me of Servanthood, to serve others, putting others before myself. And after He filled me with His love, I felt confidence. The confidence of who you are in CHrist when u serve.

When Lili prayed for me during cg, I just broke down into tears. I did not expect to cry. I did not want to wept.
But what Lili said really ministered to me. It just touched and comforted my heart. And the Love of God further thickened in my heart.

After that Bro Isa prayed for me as well. He said something that cause me to realise. Eversince I stepped into my new job, yes i meditated on the Word, but I did not commune with the Holy SPirit. Yes, I talked to the Holy SPirit, but I never had the time to listen. Yes, I pray, But I never stop to hear. I saw and thought things, according to the realm of the natural.
Bad move.

After spending time in God's Presence today, I really felt strengthened, confident, embolden to step out more, to serve, and most importantly, to seek the Lord more.

After cg, my dear cg mems gave me a card and a pen to encourage me! The pen is in purple, my fav color, and it's a pen that I like! I actually bought tat pen in blue for my brother once. I wanted to buy for myself tat time but decided not to cos I wanted to save money and there is none in purple....... haa... So I was happy when i received the pen just now.. haaa...

And the prints on the card.. I love it. When I read it, it just makes so much sense and I can totally agree with it. And of course, the encouragements that my dear cg mems wrote is priceless. I like wat pastor said. You can put value on an object and price it. But when something is precious, it's priceless.
My cg is precious to me. They are priceless.

The printed message on the card:

~Lord, Give me Strength~

Give us Your strength, Lord
Because sometimes things get tough and we are ready to quit

Give us Your love, Lord
Because sometimes people reject us and we are tempted to hate

Give ur Your eyes, Lord
Because sometimes life gets dark and we lose our way

Give us Your courage, Lord
Because often we are put under pressure and it's hard to do what is right

Give us Yourself, Lord
Because our hearts were made for You
and we will not rest until we rest in You.

- By Mark Link, S.J.

2005-07-03T20:58:00.000+08:00

'Can anyone hide in secret places so that I cannot see him?'

'Do not I fill heaven and earth?'

declares the LORD.

- Jer 23:24

2005-07-03T20:41:00.003+08:00

The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I call to the LORD, who is worthy of praise, and I am saved from my enemies.

- Ps18:23

Picture by Xiao Wei.